Goodbye, Week 7

No loss this week, and I'm fairly certain part of the problem is the sliced turkey. There is a lot of sodium in that crap, so no more. From now on, I will stick to fresh meat, and my husband is even going to make a run to Virginia to buy 100 pounds of chicken from the butcher. No more paying beach prices.

I'm really not happy with the lack of progress lately, but it really is my fault for over-indulging on things I shouldn't have. And things I can have, in some cases. I know I keep saying I'm going to refocus and do things differently, but as usual my planning sucks. Fortunately, I'm out of lunch meat, English muffins and bagels (even though these bread were whole wheat/multigrain). I do have eggs, egg substitute, apples, fresh and frozen vegetables, cheese, beans, and brown rice. Oh, and cottage cheese and chicken/turkey and lean beef. I should stick to that. My grocery store had winter squash on sale, so I have six squashes - spaghetti (YUM!!!), acorn, and butternut.

Regarding exercise, I'm a bit frustrated. I love my strength training, but I really wonder if I'm doing it properly. I'm confident that my form is good, but I sometimes feel I'm not pushing myself hard enough, even though I feel like my limbs are going to separate from my body by the time I finish. I always wonder if I could do just one more rep. Since I have been adding weight to my strength training exercises every few weeks, I an disturbed that I may not actually be getting stronger, but just not working up to my potential to begin with. But like everything else in this challenge, it's practice for the next one.

Public Service Announcement: If you don't have a digital food scale, get one!! I got one a few weeks ago and it's so much better than the crappy analog scale I was using. Much more accurate and it helps me track better.

Challenge 1 Day 48

I'm glad this week is over. I'm slowly getting the hang of the treadmill. I still hate it with every fat cell in my body, but hey, do what you have to, right?

High calorie today. Dinner was so good, I ate it twice! I seriously doubt I'll show any loss on the scale in the morning. In fact, I think I'll be up even more. Damn sodium.

apple
cottage cheese
coffee w/ cream

tilapia topped w/ cream cheese & parmesan
steamed vegetables

grilled cheese & turkey sandwich

ground chicken
pinto beans
green pepper, onion, garlic
(I had this twice, and I definitely intend to make it again in the very near future)

coffee w/ cream

Calories - 1913
Carbs - 139 (32 fiber)
Protein - 184
Fat - 76
Ratio - 38.2/37.4/34.4

Challenge 1 Day 47

I was bad and hopped on the scale this morning. Half a pound lost since Sunday. *sigh* I'm not stressing too much. I feel smaller and I can almost see where I'm losing in my belly area. UBWO was good. I really hate biceps curls. Ugh. I save them for last because they are the hardest. I wish I could just bench press all day.

I'm starting to think about the holidays and baked goods. Something I loved as a kid was making Christmas cookies. I want to do that this year with my son, but I'm afraid I'd eat all the damn cookies. I am looking at a mix of lower carb and lower fat options. I found a fantastic lower fat mini cheesecake recipe that I can probably adapt for the holidays. I could just do "the real thing" but I know I'd gain back every ounce I've lost this year, and I just can't have that.

Food was okay today. I wasn't really that hungry.

apple
cottage cheese
coffee w/ cream

scrambled egg whites w/ onion, green pepper, garlic, turkey slices
light multigrain English muffin

raw carrots, broccoli, cauliflower
turkey slices

tilapia
mashed cauliflower

Calories - 1220
Carbs - 105 (22 fiber)
Protein - 118
Fat - 37
Ratio - 34.2c/38.6p/27.3f

Challenge 1 Day 46

Cardio was much better today. I started off at a slower pace and was able to do the BFL intervals! I held back a little big because I have a big, clunky mp3 player and can't move very fast with it. I won't be getting my small one back from my step-daughter until the end of November.

Food was good. I need more veggies.

cottage cheese
apple
coffee w/ cream

scrambled eggs w/ green pepper, onion, garlic

yogurt w/ protein powder
coffee w/ cream

spaghetti squash w/ onion
ground chicken

English muffin w/ butter
turkey slices

Calories - 1301
Carbs - 115 (16 fiber)
Protein - 117
Fat - 44
Ratio - 34.8c/35.3p/29.9f

Challenge 1 Day 45

Today has been rough. I was in no mood to work out when I woke up, mainly because yesterday was my 8th wedding anniversary and I had no desire to celebrate. So guilt was getting to me this morning, and I went back to bed. When I finally got up, I made the mistake of turning the computer on. In my defense, I needed some phone numbers from a PDF file, and it never occurred to me to *gasp* use the phone book!! By the time I finished working out (complete with checking my email between sets) and got my day started, it was nearly noon. I hate that. Fortunately, I do have to be up early for an appointment tomorrow, so no slacking.

Food has been decent today. I was low on fat, so I enjoyed some extra coffee with cream. I'll eat low fat just so I can do that. I love my coffee with cream.

apple
cottage cheese
coffee w/ cream

chicken breast
raw carrots, cauliflower, broccoli
coffee w/ cream

cube steak
baked onion rings

bagel w/ low fat cream cheese

turkey slices on bagel

Calories - 1372
Carbs - 110 (17 fiber)
Protein - 123
Fat - 53
Ratio - 31.3c/35p/33.7f

Challenge 1 Day 44

Just when I thought I couldn't hate cardio any more, I try the treadmill. It totally kicked my butt, and I couldn't even do proper BFL intervals. I think need to start at a slower speed because there was no way I could sustain the faster speeds for a minute at a time. Maybe I need to take the Couch to 5K approach. Actually, I may do that between BFL challenges.

Food was great today! I ended up needing some massive calories at the end of the day to even get to 1300, but I wasn't hungry most of the day.

apple
cottage cheese
coffee w/ cream

veggie omelet

turkey slices
raw veggies

grilled chicken
mixed veggies

tuna sandwich
pepper jack cheese

Calories - 1346
Carbs - 113 (25 fiber)
Protein - 136
Fat - 45
Ratio - 32.3c/38.9p/28.8f

Challenge 1 Day 43

Today was much better. I reluctantly got out of bed, ate my pre-work out meal (which is the same as my post workout meal in terms of item and quantity, so I'll only be listing them once), and did my warm up on the treadmill. Now, I've never used a treadmill before, so this was an interesting experience. I can only imagine what tomorrow's cardio will be like. We've all seen the videos of people's feet moving too slow for the treadmill, so they get knocked down and shot like a cannon across the room. That's me.

I think I'm going to have to suck it up and shell out some big bucks for a decent protein powder. I'm having a terrible time getting enough protein. Carbs and fat are no problem at all. I have my vegetables and oils when needed. Protein is harder though, because sometimes getting enough protein puts me over my fat limit. I buy the leanest stuff I can find, but it's still sometimes pretty fatty. And let's face it - extra lean beef feels like ground cardboard. I have to really spice it up to enjoy it. Protein from meat is easy enough to get, but sometimes I get tired of meat. But what about beans, you say. Beans are a great source of protein, but they are also fairly high in carbs, so it would put me over my carb limit. I suppose I could always combine the beans and meat and try to balance my meals that way. Crikey! So simple, and it never even occurred to me. For some reason, Alice Cooper's "Hey, Stoopid" just popped into my head. Note to self: soak some pinto beans.

Food was good today, I think. I ate when I was hungry, and I didn't have any cravings.

apple
cottage cheese
coffee w/ cream

cucumber & carrots
chicken breast
English muffing w/ butter

carrots
sliced turkey

meatloaf
green beans

cottage cheese
English muffin

Calories - 1656
Carbs - 140 (36 fiber)
Protein - 153
Fat - 61
Ratio - 32.4c/35.4p/32.1f

Ironically, I'm high on protein today. Go figure.

Week 6 is history (THANK GOODNESS!!!!!!!)

It's been a horrible week. I couldn't control my eating, my workouts were half-hearted at best, and I've been incredibly unmotivated. At the halfway point, I'm down 7.5 pounds, since I was up 2.5 pounds at this morning's weigh in. And I think my math was wrong last week, saying I was down 8 pounds in 5 weeks. I was actually down 10 pounds in 5 weeks, but that's down the drain. So, officially: 7.5 pounds lost in 6 weeks. Still, not bad, but shame on my for knowing better and dismissing that knowledge in favor of 3 seconds of chocolaty heaven.

Today, I ate crap - candy, bagels and cream cheese by the boatload, and cereal. Sure, I feel guilty, but I don't freaking care. I'll care tomorrow, because tomorrow I'm starting the second half of this challenge. I have a new cardio machine so I don't have to dread the elliptical any more. I gave the treadmill a test run today, and it's going to kick my butt, I just know it. Good. I need a butt kicking.

I've also decided to alter my nutrition plan a bit. The number of carbs I've been eating cause cravings. So, I'm going to do an even split among carbs, protein, and fat. I have fewer cravings on lower carb, so I'm going to slowly work myself back. The new ranges:

1560-1860 calories
130-155 carbs
130-155 protein
57-68 fat

Per meal (at 5 meals per day):

312-372 calories
26-31 carbs
26-31 protein
11-13 fat

I feel like my math is wrong somewhere, but I'm too tired to go back and recalculate. I should probably just forget about numbers altogether and just use common sense. But I feel out of control if I can't quantify everything. Not that I'm in any kind of control now, as this week's binges show.

A big "thank you" must go out to someone who posted on my SparkPeople blog. She posted a number of suggestions for dealing with the cravings. She was absolutely right in that I need to have things prepared for situations like those, including "legal" snacks and physical distractions.

As mad as I am at myself, I'm also motivated to do better on this leg of the journey. There are only 6 weeks left in the challenge, and I've already made it through 6 weeks. I'll start sticking to my free meal on Sundays, I'll work out with every ounce of oomph I have, and I will see results. I have a new exercise routine (including different exercises and higher weights), a new playlist, and a new desire to transform. And a request from my husband to buy some thongs.

Updated Playlist

Cardio (moving from elliptical to treadmill)

Cruel Summer - Bananarama
Winner Takes It All - Sammy Hagar
You're The Best - Joe Esposito
Danger Zone - Kenny Loggins
Next To You - Buckcherry
Rhythm From A Red Car - Hardline

Strength Training

A Little Less Conversation - Elvis Presley
Same Ol' Situation - Motley Crue
Someone Like You - Bang Tango
Twisted Transistor - Korn
Lost In The Shadows - Lou Gramm
She Bangs - Ricky Martin
Break Me Shake Me - Savage Garden
Let The Music Play - Shannon
Lay Your Hands On Me - Bon Jovi
She Bop - Cyndi Lauper
It's Raining Men - Gerri Halliwell
Good Vibrations - Marky Mark & the Funky Bunch
I Can Dream About You - Dan Hartman

Updated Strength Training

Upper Body Workout

lying dumbbell row - 7.5, 10, 12.5, 15, 12.5
bent over barbell row - 20

barbell bench press – 15, 17.5, 20, 22.5, 20
dumbbell fly - 10

dumbbell raise - 5, 7.5, 10, 12.5, 10
front raise - 5

barbell curl - 12.5, 15, 17.5, 20, 17.5
hammer curl – 7.5

lying triceps extension - 5, 7.5, 10, 12.5, 10
triceps kickback – 7.5

Lower Body Workout

leg extension – 20, 22.5, 25, 27.5, 25
swiss ball squat

lying leg curl – 15, 17.5, 20, 22.5, 20
straight leg dead lift - 20

standing calf raise - 0, 10, 15, 20, 15
reverse calf raise

crunch on ball - 5, 7.5, 10, 12.5, 10
reverse crunch

Challenge 1 Day 41

I completely suck. I was doing very well until I remembered that my son had candy in the freezer. I could not get it out of my head. So I ate it. Then I ate some bagels with cream cheese. Now, I'm going to buy some candy and eat myself sick so I won't want junk food again until this challenge is over.

Challenge 1 Day 40

Another day of not tracking. When I'm not on the computer, it's harder because I hate sitting there for long periods of time plugging in all my info. Plus, I was too lazy to separate my dinner from my husband's, so I have no idea how much I actually ate. I did stay pretty legal. Except for the orange - that was probably a bit to carby for so late in the evening.

Sadly, I also slept in a bit. I was awake when my husband left for work, but I just didn't want to get up and work out. So I didn't. I got up about 90 minutes later than normal, cleaned my house up a bit, then worked out. I was very blah. I think I'm getting better at my squats though!!

I also set up the treadmill. I'll start using that next week. The Gazelle Edge had to go into storage because there just wasn't room for everything in my living room. I would like to get rid of it, but my son loves to play with it, so I will keep it for him. I just need to make room for everything.

watermelon
cottage cheese

coffee w/ cream
raw veggies (carrots, cauliflower, broccoli, cucumber)
turkey slices

a couple bites of mac & cheese (oops!)

veggie & turkey omelet

cottage cheese
orange
coffee w/ skim milk

Challenge 1 Day 39

I blew it. I ate well all day, but I was starving, and by the time dinner and dessert were over, I was ready to scream. We ordered a pizza, and I ate two slices. Certainly not a binge, but I'm still disappointed in myself. I knew I shouldn't eat the pizza, and I didn't care. I didn't bother calculating my numbers for the day.

watermelon
cottage cheese

ground turkey burger w/ mustard
American cheese
whole wheat mini bagel
coffee w/ cream

ground turkey burger w/ mustard
American cheese
whole wheat mini bagel

vegetable & beef soup
coffee w/ cream

banana sundae

pizza

Challenge 1 Day 38

A few weeks ago, my husband bought a huge watermelon. I don't know how long they stay good once you cut into them, but we've been eating it for over a week and are only halfway through. I'm eating it instead of apples with my cottage cheese, but I'm just so darn sick of watermelon! Plus, I want to try an apple cinnamon recipe I saw on a body building site (basically, apple slices warmed in a pan with cinnamon sprinkled over them).

My UBWO is in need of an overhaul. Thankfully, today was the last day for this particular set. I'm going to keep bench presses and curls, but I really hate shoulder presses and triceps extensions. I need to find some new exercises by Monday. I'm so ready to start my second cycle in this challenge.

Food was ok today, a bit high on the fat. I really don't expect to lose any weight this week. If I see a loss on Sunday, I'll be shocked. My Irish Creme syrup from Netrition came today, so I've had a lot of coffee.

watermelon
cottage cheese

watermelon
cottage cheese

bacon ranch salad from McDonald's

watermelon
cottage cheese
coffee w/ cream

turkey burgers
carrots
coffee w/ cream

Calories - 1609
Carbs - 95 (13 fiber)
Protein - 140
Fat - 76
Ratio - 23.3c/34.5p/42.1f

Challenge 1 Day 37

I am officially sick and tired of the elliptical. I picked up the treadmill today, so only 2 more days of hellish elliptical sessions and I can switch to jogging/running. I am really looking forward to that!! I need a change before I end up resenting cardio altogether.

Food was decent today. I'm not really following any percentages anymore, but I'm trying to watch my portions and stick to (mostly) natural foods. I did make the sundae from the Eating For Life book and holy crap, that is good stuff!!!! It was a lot like ice cream, but with more banana. It would make an excellent shake, too.

I can't believe I'm almost halfway through with this challenge. It's been so good for me. I'm not dropping mad pounds but I feel good and I keep reminding myself that that counts for a lot of this process.

watermelon
cottage cheese

coffee w/ cream
turkey omelet on English muffin

green beans
extra lean ground beef
mashed acorn squash

nonfat yogurt

homemade beef and vegetable soup

sundae

Calories - 1686
Carbs - 151 (23 fiber)
Protein - 144
Fat - 61
Ratio - 34.9c/33.3p/31.8f

Challenge 1 Day 36

I woke up cranky. I'm having sleep issues and I don't know how to fix them. I didn't want to work out this morning. In fact, I did everything I could for almost an hour as a way not to do it. Then, I ran out of things to do so I did my LBWO. My heart wasn't in it.

I placed an order with Netrition for some sugar free DaVinci syrups. I ordered 3 chocolate, 3 vanilla, and 6 Irish Cream. I love Irish Cream. I'll use the chocolate and vanilla in baked goods and desserts, and the Irish Cream in my teas and coffees. I can't wait until it gets here.

Food was ok today. I've been drinking a lot of coffee with cream. I may have to switch to light cream. I was trying non-dairy creamer or milk, but I miss the creaminess. So I got whipping cream, but not heavy whipping cream. I'll try the light whipping cream next time. I've also decided to use real cream instead of Cool Whip or Reddi-Whip in recipes.

watermelon
cottage cheese

coffee w/ cream
watermelon
cottage cheese

sliced turkey w/ mustard
light English muffin
coffee w/ cream

South Beach chicken wrap

green beans
extra lean ground beef
coffee w/ cream

Calories - 1405
Carbs - 95 (28 fiber)
Protein - 109
Fat - 71
Ratio - 26.2c/29.2p/43.9f

Week 5

Week 5 was good to me. I lost 2.5 pounds, so I'm down a total of 8 pounds for this challenge, 35.5 for the year. I was a good girl and stayed off the scale all week. In fact, I barely thought about the scale. Around Saturday, I noticed that I look smaller and my clothes fit looser. In fact, I threw away all my fat girl underwear and started wearing my chubby chick underwear!! I also tried on some size 12 pants and they fit on the hips. They also button in the front, and while it's not completely comfortable, they are wearable!! Not that I have anywhere to go in nice khaki pants...

Free day was ok. I had real pancakes for breakfast and some decent foods the rest of the day. We walked on the beach for a while and bought the kids ice cream. I did not have any, go me!! I made a great spaghetti dinner then blew it on dessert. I didn't binge, but I had quite a few chocolate and peanut butter cookies. I insisted that my husband take them with him to work today, so all is back to normal.

One thing I am noticing - I have more confidence. While I'm certainly not slim and fit yet, I feel fantastic and almost sexy. I'll take almost for now!

Challenge 1 Day 34

Another good day in the books. I didn't get up at my normal time (I slept in about 90 minutes) but I didn't let it ruin my day like the last time I slept in. I got up, did my cardio, got on with my day. I spent a relaxing day burning minimal calories on the couch, watching some Tivo'd shows and going through my cook books. I found a no-bake chocolate oatmeal cookie recipe that I wanted to try. Since I didn't want to eat them today, I brushed my teeth before heading into the kitchen, to keep me from sampling the goods. I didn't have enough oat meal, though, so I can't make them until I go to the store.

watermelon
cottage cheese

turkey salad w/ three cheese ranch
watermelon
coffee

turkey slices on mini bagel
coffee

chicken, onion, green pepper kebabs
mashed acorn squash

Calories - 1189
Carbs - 97 (15 fiber)
Protein - 102
Fat - 50
Ratio - 31.2c/32.7p/36f

Challenge 1 Day 33

I actually made a couple recipes from the Eating For Life book today - Fortified French Toast and Sloppy Joes. The french toast wasn't horrible and I'll probably make it again. The sloppy joes were fantastic, but I ate two servings. It was a pretty calorie high day.

I feel like a total wimp. My biceps aren't progressing - I can barely get through my sets of barbell curls, but I'm coming up on the end of 6 weeks, with only one more UBWO, and I can't decide if I should go ahead and increase the weight to change up my routine or stick with the current amounts until it gets easier. Maybe I'll surprise myself and be able to get through a heavier set. And while I'm complaining about exercise, I wish I had a squat rack. I'm running out of room in my living room for all my equipment. I wonder if I can talk my husband into building another room. Probably not, since we don't own the house.

apple
cottage cheese

fortified french toast
watermelon
coffee

cheddar cheese
watermelon
pork rinds

turkey sloppy joes
salad w/ caesar dressing

Calories - 1861
Carbs - 148 (28 fiber)
Protein - 175
Fat - 76
Ratio - 30c/35.5p/34.5f

Challenge 1 Day 32

It was a great day, in terms of food and activity. I did my cardio and it was really motivating. Then I made a good breakfast of whole wheat crepes and yogurt from the Eating for Life book. I undercooked the crepes a bit, but I need practice is all. I then spent 12 hours cleaning my house from top to bottom. I am ready to pass out!! My arms ache, my back hurts, and my feet are mad at me. But my house is clean and for the next three days, I can putz around and enjoy it.

Because I was so freaking active, I was ravenous!!! I ate whenever I got hungry. I think it worked out well.

whole wheat crepes w/ nonfat vanilla yogurt
coffee


green beans
tuna fish sandwich

cottage cheese
apple

carrots
cottage cheese

ground chicken
broccoli

broccoli
ground chicken
watermelon

Calories - 1675
Carbs - 155 (39 fiber)
Protein - 172
Fat - 54
Ratio - 34.6c/38.4p/26.9f

Challenge 1 Day 31

Another good day. I did go a bit long between mid-afternoon snack and dinner, but I was cleaning my house. I'm getting lots of exercise this week as I deep clean in preparation for winter.

I increased my dead lift and leg extension weights. I'm also ready for a new playlist, but I'll hold off on that until after next week.

cottage cheese
apple
coffee

turkey slices
whole wheat mini bagel
American cheese
coffee

cottage cheese
mashed cauliflower w/ low fat cream cheese

veggie scramble

cheddar cheese
sugar free chocolate pudding

Calories - 1255
Carbs - 107 (11 fiber - STILL need to work on this)
Protein - 125
Fat - 39
Ratio - 33.3c/39.1p/27.6f

Challenge 1 Day 30

My heart rate during cardio is slipping. Not much, but it's down a bit on my Level 10. I guess I'll be kicking it up a notch. It felt really good today, but I'm really looking forward to a change after next week.

I've been really hungry today. I ate some frankenfoods - Fiber One and Curves snack bars - to try them out. They were ok, but I really think I'd like to make my own. I also made my own protein shake. It was ok. I like them better with heavy cream instead of skim milk. I also had a good hunk of cheese. Boy, that tasted great!!!

cottage cheese
apple
coffee

egg & turkey scramble
sweet potato

Turkey on English muffin
Fiber One & Curves bars
protein shake

cheddar cheese

broccoli & beef

Calories - 1765
Carbs - 156 (35 fiber)
Protein - 187
Fat - 51
Ratio - 34c/40.8p/25.1f

Challenge 1 Day 29

Good day. I increased some of the weights in my UBWO. I ate pretty well, I think. I need to stop spending so much time at my desk. This is starting to bother me.

low fat cottage cheese
apple
coffee

whole wheat mini bagel w/ sliced turkey & mustard

veggie quiche

cottage cheese
carrots

mashed cauliflower w/ low fat cream cheese
pork chops

cottage cheese

Calories - 1454
Carbs - 125 (18 fiber)
Protein - 179
Fat - 29
Ratio - 33.9c/48.4p/17.8f

Week 4 & Stats

Though I had planned on measuring at the end of Week 4, I was really unmotivated to do so and almost pushed it to the end of Week 6. At the last minute, I changed my mind. For the most part, there are losses.

Weight - 8 pounds
Neck - 0 inches
Chest - 1.75 inches
Rib Circumference - I actually gained an inch here, so I must have messed up my first measurement somehow.
Waist - 0.5 inches
Belly - 0.25 inces
Hips - 2 inches
Thighs - 0.5 inches (R), 1 inch (L)
Calves - gained 0.25 (R), 0 inches (L)
Biceps (flexed) - 0 inches(R), 0.5 inches (L)
Triceps (gotta measure those batwings!!) - 0.5 inches (R&L)
Forearm - 0.25 inches (R), 0.5 inches (L)
Wrists - 0 inches (R), 0.25 inches (L)

I'm not sure how I feel about my progress. On the one hand, I'm disappointed that it's not more. On the other hand, I know that 1-2 pounds per week is what is considered healthy loss. So, I'm right there in the healthy loss category. I think some of my frustration goes back to when I was (improperly) low carbing and I'd have bigger losses each week. I was a scale-a-holic, weighing in daily, severely restricting calories if I showed any gains. I don't do that anymore, and I should be proud of my progress thus far.

I didn't do it last week (or the week before, I think) but I meant to review my goals at the end of each week.

1. Strive for consistency, not perfection! So far, I've definitely not been perfect! I think I have been fairly consistent. There were a few days when I couldn't eat on schedule, and a couple where I ate things that aren't quite BFL friendly, but no apparent harm came of it.

2. Make BFL a part of my life. Body For Life is certainly providing a foundation for whatever is next. Whether I'll do another challenge remains to be seen. I am positive, at this point, that I won't start my second challenge until January 2008. During the 5 or 6 weeks between this challenge and the new year, I'm going to try a different approach. If I don't like it, I will go back to BFL.

3. Weigh no more than once a week. Er, yeah. Week 3 was bad for this. I was on the scale every day. However, during Week 4, I only weighed on my weigh in day. I like it that way.

4. Learn to like oatmeal. I have not started this yet. I will.

5. Make exciting meals. It's not boring, usually. I ordered Eating For Life and I'm dying for it to get here.

Free day was very free. I didn't gorge on anything, but I did have things I haven't had in a while. I didn't track or measure anything, and it felt good. I ate when I was hungry and that was it.

Challenge 1 Day 27

Good day, I think. I caved and had a cupcake with the kids again. Just one. And dinner was all messed up because my husband said he'd be home at a certain time, and wasn't, so that threw me off.

scrambled eggs
mini bagel w/ light cream cheese
coffee

sliced turkey
carrots

cupcake
carrots
chicken breast
mozzarella cheese
(not eaten together, but in a 2 hour span)

chicken & cream cheese stuffed chicken breast w/ enchilada sauce

Calories - 1340
Carbs - 107 (10 fiber - MUST WORK ON THIS!!!!!)
Protein - 130
Fat - 44
Ratio - 31.8c/38.7p/29.5f

Challenge 1 Day 26

Yesterday was pretty good. I messed up my LBWO because I forgot I increased the weight for my dead lift. I'll remember next time. Food was a bit tricky, as I was hosting a birthday party for my niece and I made cupcakes with little bowls of ice cream. She and her younger brother, my son's age, were also going to spend the night. I was really worried that I would pig out on cupcakes and ice cream and miss my cardio in the morning. Fortunately neither happened. I had one cupcake and one small bowl of chocolate ice cream, and I did my cardio. I still feel guilty, even though my numbers for yesterday still look pretty good.

low fat cottage cheese
multi-grain light English muffin
coffee

crustless veggie quiche

turkey slices
carrots, broccoli, cauliflower w/ dip

chicken wrap

cake & ice cream

low fat cottage cheese

Calories - 1493
Carbs - 160 (28 fiber)
Protein - 143
Fat - 39
Ratio - 40.9c/36.5p/22.6f

Fantastic Veggie Dip or Dressing

This tastes pretty good. Use whatever level of fat you like.

1 tbs mayonnaise
1 tbs sour cream
1/2 tbs spicy brown mustard
garlic & onion powder to taste
pepper to taste
splash of hot sauce
1/2 tbs white vinegar

There is nothing more UNmotivating than...

Reading "expert" opinions that your cardio equipment of choice is a worthless piece of crap.

Since I began this quest for muscle maintenance (and maybe small gains), I have been reading on some of the more popular body building boards. That, of course, is the problem. I'm not interested in body building, certainly not in the same way most of the posters on those board are. Frankly, I think a lot of muscle is gross looking, especially on a woman. That comment is probably offensive, but hey, it's my blog!

Anyway, various boards (and one in particular) really stress me out. There is a lot of great information on those boards, which is why I read, but I occasionally run across a discussion that just makes me feel like everything I've done this year has been useless.

The problem is, everyone acts like their way is right, and it's not. That's when I get pissy. People who aren't experts act like authorities. My way isn't right, your way isn't right, for everyone else. It's right for me. It's right for you. That's why I try not to give advice, so I don't come off as sounding like an omniscient, condescending prick. And that's exactly what one guy on one of the boards sounds like.

Don't get me wrong - there are some people who give great advice without sounding like assholes. It's usually the women. Does testosterone trigger some sort of dick head area of the brain?

Unfortunately, I'll have to either stay off those boards and miss out on valuable information, or take the good with the bad. You really find this situation on every type of board. The Drama Queen in me can't stay away from some places, and I think that's also the part of me that gets so cranky over other things.

But really, it pisses me of and makes me feel like shit when someone says I'm doing [whatever] wrong.

I need to add that part of my frustration may be due to not knowing exactly what I want. For now, I want to maintain the muscle mass I do have and shed body fat. I still have 45 pounds to lose, so I'm a lot way off from body building physique, even if I wanted it. My goals certainly don't match those of the people I'm reading on the other boards.

Challenge 1 Day 25

I think it's time to kick the Level 5 cardio up a notch. I can either start of with more speed or more resistance. I'm not sure which. Next cardio day, I'll see how my body reacts to starting out with more resistance, and if I can't get through it, I'll go for speed.

Food was good. I wasn't all that hungry yesterday, but I did make myself eat 6 small meals. I need to eat more vegetables. My fiber has been low.

low fat cottage cheese
apple
coffee

ground chicken
brown rice
coffee

chicken tortilla w/ mustard & light mayo
sugar free pudding cup

carrots
low fat cottage cheese

potato
round steak

low fat cottage cheese

Calories - 1519
Carbs - 123 (18 fiber)
Protein - 164
Fat - 44
Ratio - 32.1c/42.5p/25.5f

There is nothing more motivating than...

Finding pictures of yourself in a bathing suit or bra and underwear when you're at your all time high. Holy fat, batman! I'm certainly no skinny minnie yet, but jeez, the difference is certainly nice to see. I am thoroughly embarrassed to look at the pictures from December 2005 and August 2006. I think I was 190-195 in those pictures. I didn't realize at the time just how bad it was. I want to cry. Ok, not really because I've lost 30 pounds since then, and that's great! But I am never going to be that person again.

Challenge 1 Day 24

The increased weight on my bench presses makes a big difference. I had jelly arms all day!!

Food was good, even though I overdid the EVOO (yes I'm a Rachel Ray fan) on my roasted vegetables. And I think I'm familiar enough with what I'm eating now that I can stop posting quantities here. I'm still tracking them in my spreadsheet, but for blogging purposes, I don't think it is necessary to note them anymore.

apple
cottage cheese

coffee
scrambled egg mates w/ sliced turkey, onion, garlic, green pepper
toast w/ butter

sliced turkey
EVOO roasted cauliflower, carrots, onion, broccoli

taco salad w/ ground chicken, salsa, low fat sour cream

Calories - 1307
Carbs - 90 (24 fiber)
Protein - 112
Fat - 68
Ratio - 25.5c/31.6p/42.9f

Challenge 1 Day 23

Cardio was great. It really makes me feel like I've accomplished something when I do it, as weird as that sounds. I hope my mother-in-law buys her Total Gym soon so I can have her stationary bike. A change in cardio would be good and I'm really too cheap to buy another expensive piece of equipment. Weights, yes. Machines, no.

Food was good, as well. My last meal was late because my husband was late getting home. It's a good thing I opted for a light snack off schedule.

4 oz apple
3/4 cup regular cottage cheese
16 oz coffee w/ 2 tbs skim milk

1 whole wheat mini bagel
1 tsp mustard
3 slices ff turkey
2 slices hard salami

4 oz chicken
1 tbs extra virgin olive oil
1/2 bag lettuce trio
3 oz cauliflower
1 oz broccoli

1 whole wheat mini bagel
1 tsp mustard
3 slices ff turkey
3 slices hard salami

3 oz ground chicken
1/2 cup brown rice
5 oz green pepper

Calories - 1410
Carbs - 122 (18 fiber)
Protein - 125
Fat - 53
Ratio - 33.3c/34p/32.6f

Challenge 1 Day 22

The new LBWO with increased weight is great! I was really feeling it. I also found a great article to help me with my ab exercises and I think it helped me focus on improving my form. So, yay there! I think I need to increase the load on the dead lifts a bit, so I'll do that with Friday's session.

I tried another EAS product, the chocolate peanut butter snack bar. It was ok. Not as gastrically distressing as the brownie bar I tried last week. The bars are ok for emergencies, but since they are so expensive and pumped full of chemicals, I won't be buying them regularly. It makes me wonder how people can eat stuff like that on a regular basis - is it really any healthier than eating a bag of M&Ms or other "evil" food? Heck, I can pronounce the ingredients in M&Ms, but not in the EAS products. So which one is really the lesser of two evils? I think I'd enjoy it more if I balanced a handful of M&Ms with a handful of jerky.

Other than my emergency snack bar, food was good. I paired the carb overload of the bar with some salami, so my sodium intake was pretty high. Salami is good though. Expensive, but good.

3 oz apple
3/4 cup regular cottage cheese
16 oz coffee w/ 2 tbs skim milk

1 tbs onion
1 tbs green pepper
3 tsp garlic
1/2 cup egg mates
1 large egg
1 whole wheat mini bagel
2 slices ff turkey
1 tsp mustard

5 oz carrots
2 oz broccoli
4 oz cauliflower
4 oz chicken breast
(all of this was roasted in a bit of balsamic vinegar, and was great!)

1 AdvantEdge chocolate peanut butter snack bar
3 slices salami

2/3 cup corn
6 oz top sirloin

Calories - 1346
Carbs - 106 (18 fiber)
Protein - 148
Fat - 41
Ratio - 30.7c/42.9p/26.4f

Week 3

Week 3 was a mixed bag. I was horrible about staying off the scale. I was on that stupid thing every day, and it was driving me nuts. So no more - Sundays only from now on. It finally clicked in that I'm not going see rapid losses like I did while doing Atkins or eating under 1000 calories. This was a big revelation for me. In order for me to take this weight off and keep it off, I need to do it slowly, in a way that doesn't deprive me of anything. I don't feel deprived doing it this way at all. I did deprive myself on low calorie diets and on Atkins. I guess it really does go to show that the diet that works best is one you can stick to. Not that I've stuck to this long term, but I didn't stick to Atkins, which did take the weight off. And that's because I didn't feel like doing Atkins the right way. I hated the carb ladder. I don't have to worry about that with BFFM/BFL.

I am pleased with my progress. In 3 weeks, I'm down 6 p0unds. I'd like to lose 30-45 more pounds, depending on body fat. I'm shooting for 22%, maybe 20% for now. Hopefully, I can achieve these goals in 3 challenges.

I took a good look at myself today. I'm incredibly flabby and I have a lot of fat to lose. For some reason, I wasn't all that upset. Sure, I regret getting myself into this condition in the first place, but for once, I wasn't disgusted because I feel like I'm heading in the right direction. And just knowing the transformation that my body will undergo in the next year keeps me from getting depressed.

Food yesterday was pretty good. I ate a normal breakfast and lunch, then a quick yogurt snack. For dinner, we went to a seafood buffet (we only go twice a year, when my father-in-law is visiting, his treat!!) and I tried a few things that I've never had before. I eat quiet a bit, I admit, but I didn't stress about it. I enjoyed it. And I ate enough that there was no room in my stomach to come home and drink like I'd planned. I don't drink often, but when I do, I like to get a good buzz. All those calories add up. So, in the end, I think I saved myself some calories. And a hangover. That was the real reason I didn't want to drink - I didn't want to risk a hangover interfering with my workout in the morning.

Updated Strength Training Routine

It's time to increase the load on my legs. I also changed up some upper body stuff, but I'm still quite wimpy. I did increase the bench press load.

Upper Body Workout

lying dumbbell row - 5, 7.5, 10, 12.5, 10
bent over barbell row - 10

barbell bench press – 12.5, 15, 17.5, 20, 17.5
dumbbell fly - 7.5

dumbbell press - 5, 7.5, 10, 12.5, 10
lateral raise - 5

barbell curl - 10, 12.5, 15, 17.5, 15
hammer curl - 5

seated triceps extension - 5, 7.5, 10, 12.5, 10
dumbbell triceps extension - 5

Lower Body Workout

leg extension – 17.5, 20, 22.5, 25, 22.5
swiss ball squat

lying leg curl – 12.5, 15, 17.5, 20, 17.5
straight leg dead lift - 20

standing calf raise - 0, 10, 15, 20, 15
reverse calf raise

crunch on ball - 5, 7.5, 10, 12.5, 10
reverse crunch

Challenge 1 Day 20

I have been starving today!!! I seriously can't get enough to eat. I ate six times, and I could go for another meal. I've brushed my teeth and am getting ready for bed, to sleep the hunger away.

Cardio was good. I'd rather lift, though. But I suppose, 20 minutes 3 times a week isn't horrible.

Food was great, I think. I ate a lot, but it was all good stuff. I have switched from nonfat to regular cottage cheese because most days, I am struggling to get the calories in. And let's be honest - it just tastes better. I've always wondered what food manufacturers do with the fat they remove from products.

1 cup cottage cheese
5 oz apple
16 oz coffee w/ 2 tbs skim milk

4 oz chicken breast
1 tbs extra virgin olive oil
1/2 bag lettuce trio
4 oz cucumber
1 tbs onion
1 tbs green pepper
5 oz carrots

1 tbs light mayonnaise
1 tsp mustard
6.5 oz tuna
2 slices double fiber wheat bread

1 cup cottage cheese
4 oz carrots

8 oz shrimp
5 oz baked potato
2 cups green beans
2 tbs low fat sour cream

2 oz mozzarella
1 sugar free chocolate pudding

Calories - 1858
Carbs - 174 (34 fiber)
Protein - 187
Fat - 59
Ratio - 36.2c/38.8p/25f

Another BFLer pointed this out.

We're doing 60 reps per muscle group.

It doesn't seem like that much. Thinking back on the days of 3 sets of 12, I'm shocked that I'm actually capable of doing this current program. Some muscle builders will argue that only sets of 5-6 are really needed, provided the weight load is very heavy. I wonder if I'll ever get to the point where I can do that. Competitive body building is not something I am really interested in, but I would like to build some significant muscle, more than just tone up. For now, I'm content to read about really building muscle, not the stuff that makes people comment, "Oh, you're just building muscle" when someone posts of gaining a pound or two in a week. It doesn't happen like that, I know. But I really want to get into the science of it all.

Yes, I am a geek.

Challenge 1 Day 19

Yesterday was pretty good. I worked out, ate well, and even tried another EAS product. I had the AdvantEdge Chocolate Chip Brownie snack bar. It was much better than the Myoplex meal replacement bar I tried before. However, I failed to notice that the AdvantEdge bars have sugar alcohols in them. Needless to say, I was uncomfortable the rest of the day. I also ate late (around 10 PM) and for some reason, I had it in my had that I had to balance my carbs with my protein for the day, so I ended with a lot of fruit and a little protein right before bed. Probably not the smartest idea.

16 oz coffee w/ 2tbs creamer
4 oz apple
1.25 cups nonfat cottage cheese

1/2 cup egg mates
1 large egg
2 slices ff smoked turkey
2 oz green pepper
2 oz onion
3 tsp garlic

1 tbs light mayonnaise
6.5 oz tuna
4 oz cucumber
1 tsp mustard
1 AdvantEdge chocolate chip brownie snack bar

5 oz round steak
1 tbs extra virgin olive oil
1.5 cup green beans
1 tbs bacon bits
1 tbs parmesan cheese

1 whole wheat mini bagel
2 slices ff smoked turkey
4 oz apple
4 oz banana

Calories - 1733
Carbs - 166 (26 fiber)
Protein - 165
Fat - 47
Ratio - 37.9c/37.8p/24.3f