Thursday, June 30, 2011

New Rules of Lifting for Abs - Week 2 - Thursday

No workout today. I played a bit of basketball and catch with my son. Nothing even remotely strenuous. Or even moderate.

Food:
coffee w/ skim milk
scrambled eggs w/ onion, garlic & peppers, rye bread toast w/ butter
Monster cookies - I ate too many of these before I even baked them.
buffalo chicken meatball subs w/ coleslaw

Freaking cookies. I had no self-control today. When do I ever?

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

New Rules of Lifting for Abs - Week 2 - Wednesday

plank - 2x90 sec
side plank - 2x45 sec, each side

split squat, front foot elevated - 3x12x25 lbs, each side
suspended row - 3x12

Romanian deadlift - 3x12x100 lbs
push up - 3x12

My shoulder is a lot better than when I did this last week. I desperately need to work on grip, or just do my split squats slower. I will be so glad when this stage of the program is over. I despise 12 reps.

Food:
coffee w/ skim milk
apple & cottage cheese
scrambled eggs w/ onion, garlic & red peppers, avocado & hot sauce, Hungry Girl coffee malt
ham & cheese on light English muffin, raw vegetables w/ hummus
dark chocolate

I'm not thrilled that I ate the chocolate, but it was only half a serving. I wanted food often today. Most of the time, I recognized that I wasn't hungry and let it go, but it still pissed me off that I couldn't eat. Well, I could have but it wasn't the right thing to do.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

New Rules of Lifting for Abs - Week 2 - Tuesday

No work out today. I meant to do some heavy house cleaning but I kept getting distracted by little cleaning things so I didn't even work up a sweat.

Food:
coffee w/ skim milk
eggs & tomato on light English muffin
ham & lettuce wrap
roasted chick peas
pasta & beef w/ sauteed zucchini & marina
raw vegetables w/ roasted red pepper hummus

What I really wanted instead of vegetables & hummus was a giant Idon'carewhatformit'sin chocolate. I was in a horrible mood all day and I was trying not to eat out of anger. I wasn't really hungry when I ate the vegetables & hummus. On the one hand, at least it was healthy food. On the other hand, that is exactly the kind of behavior I'm trying to break. I'm not happy with the lesser of two evils.

Monday, June 27, 2011

New Rules of Lifting for Abs - Week 2 - Monday

Only Week 2??? Feels like longer


anti-rotation static hold - I actually did not do this one because on my first set, I ended up pulling my squat rack halfway across the room, so I need to find somewhere else to anchor my bands. I can't just load up a weight bar to hold the rack in place because it would take forever to disassemble for my pull downs. So I need to find somewhere else, or better yet - an alternative, because I don't really feel anything with this, even with my shortest, thickest band.

elevated plank - 10x10 sec
elevated side plank - 5x10 sec each side

dumbbell single-leg Romanian deadlift 3x12x20 lbs each leg
dumbbell alternating shoulder press 3x12x15 lbs each arm

overhead squat - 3x12x20 lbs
cable kneeling pulldown - 3x12x40 lbs

Food:
coffee w/ skim milk
banana
cheese omelet w/ onion, garlic & green peppers, plum
vegetarian chili w; light sour cream
carrot sticks & homemade fries
apple & cottage cheese
grilled cheese sandwich

Today was wonderful! I didn't think about points, I didn't worry about timing between meals, I just ate. And when I thought I was hungry, I stopped and asked myself if I really was, and the answer was usually NO.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

New Rules of Lifting for Abs - Week 1 - Sunday

I'm so fucking over dieting - Weight Watchers, Atkins, South Beach - making it a lifestyle. I just can't do it anymore. I'm tired of stressing about calories and points and carbs and fat. It's sucking all the pleasure out of food, and then when I do eat something especially pleasurable, I feel supreme guilt and think, "screw it!" and binge. I'm just tired of it. Yesterday, I quit tracking my points and just went with it. I skipped ice cream and a bunch of other junk that would have driven me nuts not to have had I been counting points.

I've figured out that my problem isn't knowing how much to eat or knowing what to eat. It's knowing when to eat and knowing how to stop. I'm not willing to give up carbs or fat or treats or red meat or pickyourpoison. I just want to eat what I need and enjoy it. For the last four years, I've been stressing over diet and I can't do it anymore. Sure, it has to be a lifestyle but I can't follow someone else's rules and guidelines. I can't live within the confines of 29 points per day and 49 points per week. I can't take being upset over only burning 200 calories after busting my ass for 45-60 minutes. I JUST CANNOT DO IT ANYMORE! So I quit. I give up. I am done trying to lose weight.

Instead, there are things I need to work on:

Eating when genuinely hungry.
Stop eating when I'm physically satisfied. (I am rarely mentally satisfied.)
Eating complete meals, rather than snacking.

Food:
coffee w/ skim milk
cheese sticks - This is an example of what I mean by not snacking. Instead of taking the time to make a proper breakfast, I just grabbed these.
apple - Again with the snack.
salad w/ tuna fish & light dressing
red pepper slices & celery - See? I'm snacky.
stuffed pork chops w/ green beans & rye bread - Ugh. I ate some of the leftover stuffing while I was making the pork chops. And then I definitely ate too much.

I noticed that after I ate dinner, I kept wanting something else to eat. I had to stop and ask myself if I was really hungry. I wasn't, and I knew it, but still, part of my mind was telling me, "Have some cereal." I almost bought a candy bar at the store, and changed my mind at the last minute. I did have a small bite of the one I bought for my son, though. It's taking everything in me not to turn this into a free-for-all, but it's not as agonizing as not having something because I shouldn't, or don't have enough points for it. I know it's going to get harder and there will be times when I can't control the urge.

Saturday, June 25, 2011

New Rules of Lifting for Abs - Week 1 - Saturday

I ended up having a turkey & cheese wrap and a peanut butter sandwich after I blogged last night. I can't remember how many points it was but it doesn't matter because I'm not tracking this weekend, either. And let me just say, it was very nice not to stress about eating today. I was volunteering at OBX PrideFest and I wanted to get something from one of the local vendors without worrying about it "screwing up" my day. If I'd been counting points, not knowing how many points were in something would have put me in a bad mood, and that would have led to one "screw it" after another.

No formal exercise, but I did spend 5 hours outside directing cars in the parking lot then walking the festival grounds. I even drank quite a bit of water.

Food:
banana & cheese
coffee w/ skim milk
chicken caesar wrap
turkey salad w/ light dressing & avocado
cheese & avocado omelet w/ Canadian bacon & Sandwich Thin
carrot & celery sticks

And today's big victory - after I ate my chicken wrap at the festival, I was stationed directly across from the ice cream stand. I wanted to try one of the Ben & Jerry's Half Baked ice creams. Oh, how I wanted it. I wouldn't even have minded paying the $3.50 for it. I really, really, really wanted that damn ice cream. But I told myself I didn't need it, I wasn't hungry, and I could have a frozen banana with homemade frozen chocolate yogurt when I got home. Like I mentioned above, any other day counting points or "trying" to be good, I would have had the ice cream. Today, I didn't.

Friday, June 24, 2011

New Rules of Lifting for Abs - Week 1 - Friday

No changes to this one since Monday's workout:

plank - 2x90 sec
side plank - 2x45 sec, each side

split squat, front foot elevated - 3x12x20 lbs, each side
suspended row - 3x12

Romanian deadlift - 3x12x100 lbs
push up - 3x12

2 activity points for it. I either pulled something in my shoulder yesterday or slept on it wrong but it's been killing me all day and the deadlifts were brutal. I tried some foam rolling and it didn't really help. It made other parts of my body tense.

Food:
coffee w/ skim milk [2]
apple & cottage cheese [5]
turkey w/ sweet potato & homemade sauce [13]
carrot sticks & cheese [4]
crepes w/ banana & nutella [9]

I used all of my daily points and have 33 weekly and 10 activity points remaining.

Starting Monday, I'm going to stop doing Weight Watchers for a while. I need a break. My head is so messed up about food that I can't stand it anymore. Points this, points that, Good Health Guidelines...I am not going to stop blogging and I'm not going to stop posting my food and exercise. I'm just not counting anything and I'm not going to worry about getting at least 2 dairies and 2 oils and all that shit. I'm going to eat.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

New Rules of Lifting for Abs - Week 1 - Thursday

I had a banana after I blogged last night. I was so hungry.

I did Turbo Jam Fat Blaster today and my net burn was 119 calories. Fucking seriously? Why do I bother with cardio for a deficit when I will just need to starve myself to get it anyway? Ugh, 1 activity point.

Food:
coffee w/ skim milk [2]
cheese omelet w/ Bagel Thin [8]
apple & cottage cheese [5]
carrot sticks & banana [0]
roast w/ risotto [10]
salad w/ homemade dressing [5]

I used all of my daily points and have 37 weekly and 8 activity points remaining. And again, I only got 20 ounces of water. I just cannot gag it down. I know all the tips for drinking water and I just...yuck. I hate water, even after 4 years of forcing myself to drink it.

I did have a moment where I really hated myself today. My husband made mozzarella sticks (2000 calories worth - he ate about 3/4 of them). I wanted some, but I knew if I had some, it would set me off. Then I figured I could go ahead and have 4, with some marinara and it wouldn't be too bad. I put them on my plate, and immediately dumped them back onto the pan. I knew, I KNEW that I would lose control if I ate them. Instead of being proud of myself for making a good choice, I despised myself for my inability to control myself and enjoy things in moderation. And once again, I'm resentful that I can't eat things I really enjoy. I had a salad instead. It sucked.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

New Rules of Lifting for Abs - Week 1 - Wednesday

My legs were still sore from Monday's workout, so I was dreading this. I still dislike the warm up.

anti-rotation static hold - 2x30 sec each side
elevated plank - 10x10 sec
elevated side plank - 5x10 sec each side

dumbbell single-leg Romanian deadlift 3x12x20 lbs each leg
dumbbell alternating shoulder press 3x12x15 lbs each arm

overhead squat - 1x12x30 lbs, 2x12x20 lbs
cable kneeling pulldown - 3x12x40 lbs

This was my first time doing most of these moves. I took it easy on the squat because of that, and the fact that my legs are still sore. I dug out the lat pull "machine" my husband made for me years ago. The elevated planks were something. I started out using my stability ball but it was too unstable so I switched to a chair. I am sure I'll be using the ball by the time I finish Stage 1.

I'm having balance problems with my feet, especially on single-leg exercises. I'm an over-pronator and I can most definitely feel it. I ended up taking off my cross-trainers (my running shoes are for over-pronators, but I don't like wearing them in the house) and doing everything in bare feet. It was a little better but I am still horribly unbalanced.

It was a challenging workout - 2 activity points, I guess.

Food:
coffee w/ skim milk [2]
apple & cottage cheese [5]
cheese omelet w/ turkey & Sweet Heat Addiction [9]
turkey & cheese [6]
shepherd's pie [10]
grapes [0]
apple [0]
turkey & cheese sandwich [9]

I ate all of my daily points, and have 37 weekly and 7 activity points remaining. I only got 20 ounces of water (again), and I totally forgot that I was supposed to fast today. So intermittent fasting is just not going to happen!

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

New Rules of Lifting for Abs - Week 1 - Tuesday

I did Turbo Jam Cardio Party 3 today, and burned 273 calories (3 Activity Points). I don't know about this stupid heart rate monitor. I kept losing my signal, so I moved the band up above my breasts, rather than under and near the bottom of my sports bra. It stopped cutting out after that. I will see how it goes Thursday, then I'm going to replace the battery in the watch if there's still a problem. I mainly lose the signal when I'm going really hard and/or my hands are in the air. So the band could be slipping (even though I've adjusted it) or the receiver isn't getting a good signal because it's too far from the transmitter in the chest strap when my hands are in the air. I just bought the chest strap last year, because I thought my original was going bad. But now I'm beginning to think I just got a crap Polar.

Food:
apple & cottage cheese [4]
coffee w/ skim milk [1]
carrot sticks [0]
eggs, green beans w/ homemade dressing [9]
turkey & cheese w/ carrot sticks [6]
banana [0]
grilled turkey & cheese w/ pico de gallo [7]
salad w/ light dressing [2]
grapes [0]

I only managed 20 ounces of water today. I'll have to do better tomorrow. I used all of my daily points, and have 49 weekly & 5 activity points remaining.

Monday, June 20, 2011

New Rules of Lifting for Abs - Week 1 - Monday

Yay, it's been three months since I've lifted weights. I bought this book on a whim and talked my friend Melissa into doing it with me. Not that it takes much convincing with her anymore. I love having a workout buddy who is on the same page as I am.

Anyway, NROL for Abs is pretty different from the first two NROL programs. It includes a 13 exercise warm up and a core workout before the rest of the workout. I did not like the warm up at all. Most of the moves, except for the squats and butt kicks, felt weird. It took me forever, too, because I had to learn the form. That should improve but I am still not crazy about the warm up.

plank - 2x90 sec
side plank - 2x45 sec, each side

split squat, front foot elevated - 3x12x20 lbs, each side
suspended row - 3x12

Romanian deadlift - 3x12x100 lbs
push up - 3x12

I'll take 2 Activity Points for this. Start to finish, it took about 45 minutes. I'm not sure what I think about it. It was difficult because I haven't lifted in three months.

Oh, and the damage from my vacation: 7 pounds. I lost 8 doing Insanity and gained all but 1 pound back. I am willing to bet that half of it is water weight from the carb-fest. But damn, I am so sick of this ride. I don't know what to do. Well, I know what to do. I don't know why I can't do it. All I wanted today was junk, junk, junk and meat. But I'm determined to stick with Meatless Mondays for the rest of the year (bringing me to 2 years). It sort of forces me to try new non-meat dishes, too. Anyway, I wanted to stuff my face all day and didn't, and when I got to the end of the day, I was sort of scrambling to meet my daily points.

Food:
apple & cottage cheese [5]
steamed broccoli w/ cheese [5]
carrot sticks w/ homemade dip [5]
apple [0]
vegetarian chili [5]
coffee w/ skim milk [1]
peanut butter & Nutella sandwich [8]

I did get 80 ounces of water, and no pop until I drank all the water. I did get all of my daily points in, and have 49 weekly points (and 2 activity points) remaining.

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Post-Insanity Break - Weeks 2 & 3

What a clusterfuck! Right off the bat, I got derailed. On the first Monday, I started work early and was in such a rush that I left the house without packing breakfast OR lunch. Since it was the last week of school, our menu was not typical and I screwed up my Meatless Monday :( I was at work early every day that week, just eating school food and not caring. That made me not care at home, too. It was a mess. I am still so mad at myself. I should know better, yet I always let this happen when I don't have a workout plan and I don't blog.

The next week started off better. I was at my inlaws' house for the week, and I did some grocery shopping when I got there. I had everything I needed - fruit, cottage cheese, eggs, vegetables. Meatless Monday went fairly well, as in I stayed meatless. But everything else fell apart. I never touched my vegetables. I did eat the fruit and the eggs and the cottage cheese. But I also ate tons of other crap. TONS of other crap. I'm so angry with myself. I've undone all the work I did during Insanity. I'm disgusted and ashamed. Again.

Tomorrow, I start New Rules of Lifting for Abs. I'm going to continue with Weight Watchers, but I'm also going experiment with fasting once a week. I read Brad Pilon's Eat Stop Eat while I was on vacation. I don't completely buy it but you know me - I have to try. I'm only doing 24 hours, once a week (Wednesdays). I honestly don't know if I'll actually be able to follow through. I like my food, damn it.

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Post-Insanity Break - Week 1 - Sunday - Rest Day

More house cleaning. I probably won't get in a formal workout until next weekend when I'm in New York. I plan to go running a bit. My mother-in-law's road is long and hilly. I also put together my own little Insanity-like circuit that I plan to try.

Weigh in day - 128.5, down 1.5 from last Sunday. I'll take it. I'd like to take 8.5 more.

Food:
coffee w/ skim milk [1]
cheese omelet & light English muffin w/ avocado [11]
McDonald's grilled chicken snack wrap & small fries [13] - Not too bad points-wise but not filling at all.
apple & peanut butter sandwich [15]
cheese [5]
roasted chicken breast & sauteed zucchini & onion w/ olive oil [15]
watermelon [0]

I used all of my daily points and the activity point leftover from yesterday, and I have 5 weekly points (I think) going unused.

For the next two weeks, I'm only going to post weekly. I'll do one giant post on Sundays, with all the stuff I write during the week. I still want to be accountable but I won't have time to do daily blogs. Plus, I won't really be working out this coming week.

Saturday, June 4, 2011

Post-Insanity Break - Week 1 - Saturday - Max Interval Circuit

Ah, my favorite Insanity workout, to test the new settings on the HRM some more. With the old VO2max setting, my last burn for this workout was 311. Today's burn was 279 calories, so 32 "fewer" calories. I don't get this stupid thing. I'm taking 4 activity points. This is nuts. I have really been overestimating my calorie burn all this time - no wonder I can't lose weight.

Food:
coffee w/ skim milk [2]
apple & cottage cheese [5]
cheese omelet, light English muffin w/ avocado [11]
apple [0]
salad w/ chicken breast, light dressing & olive oil [10]
apple & hard boiled eggs [4]

I sure loved apples today.

I used all of my daily points, three of my activity points, and have 30 weekly points remaining.

Friday, June 3, 2011

Post-Insanity Break - Week 1 - Friday - Turbo Jam Fat Blaster

I last did this workout during my Insanity recovery week, back when the VO2max setting on my heart rate monitor was showing me as more fit than I really am, and my net burn then was 274 calories. Today, with a more accurate VO2max setting, my net burn was 149??? What hell? I don't get it. I'm certain I am less fit than I had my HRM set for all this time. I just blogged about this Monday!!  I am so confused. I'm taking 3 activity points, damn it. Tomorrow when I do Insanity Max Interval Circuit, we'll compare it to the number I got last week.

Food:
iced coffee w/ skim milk [4]
apple & cottage cheese [5]
banana [0]
turkey bacon salad w/ light dressing [8]
turkey, avocado & cheese wrap [13]

I used all of my daily and activity points and have 30 weekly points remaining.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Post-Insanity Break - Week 1 - Thursday - Rest Day

I ate some Cool Whil & chocolate chips last night after I blogged - BOO! 12 points gone in an instant.

Food:
iced coffee w/ skim milk [4]
apple & cottage cheese [5]
turkey salad w/ light dressing & olive oil [13]
apple [0]
salad [7]

I used all of my daily points and have 30 weekly points remaining.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Post-Insanity Break - Week 1 - Wednesday - Rest Day

Again, "rest day" is deceiving. I've been moving like a mad woman, doing extra cleaning at work, working with the kids after school, reorganizing my house. I don't intend to do a "real" workout before Saturday.

Food:
iced coffee w/ skim milk [4]
apple & hard boiled eggs [4]
turkey sunshine salad w/ light dressing & olive oil [13]
homemade breakfast burrito [9]
carrot sticks [0]

I used all of my daily points and have 42 weekly points remaining.