Turbulence Training - Day 56 of 84

Weigh in day - 131.5. That's down about 3 pounds from last week, but still not close to my December low. I don't think I'm going to make 127 by the end of the next 4 weeks. I probably could if I stuck to a 1200 calorie a day diet but screw that. I need food.

I was thinking about going back to measuring out my food and tracking calories for a while. I still planned to follow the Weight Watchers Simply Filling Technique (old Core), but just write down how much I was eating to see how much I was actually eating. I'd convinced myself that I needed to do that for a while (I'd planned on doing it until I left for New York). But I don't want to be a slave to that again. I think I am (slowly) starting to recognize my "satisfied" threshold. Sometimes I ignore it, so the next step is to work on listening to that part of me that tells me I can stop eating. It's just that sometimes my mouth and brain are enjoying to food so much. So I'm not going to track calories again. I'm going to stick with what I've been doing. My lack of progress has nothing to do with the plan I'm on. It never does. My lack of progress is all a result of my stupid decisions to overeat junk food. My regular food choices are good. Damn good. I need to get myself into that "once in a while, a little bit is enough" mentality for the chocolate and sweets. If I were at maintenance, I could probably fit a small amount of chocolate into my daily menu and be okay with it. Since I still want to lose about 15 pounds, I'm having a hard time "allowing" myself to make it a part of my life. As a result, it becomes that forbidden food that always derails me when I can no longer resist. I need to find a way around that. I refuse to live my life without sugar. I just won't do it.

scrambled eggs w/ onion, red peppers, avocado & salsa, ground venison

banana & a few grapes

chicken breast, salsa & light cream cheese [2 pts] over salad vegetables

rice cakes w/ peanut butter & nutella [6 pts]

grapes

chicken breast, salsa & light cream cheese [2 pts] w/ Spanish bulgur; I did have another half serving of the bulgur about half hour after I ate.

apple & cottage cheese

Three cups of coffee. No water today. 1 activity point unused this week.