P90X - Week 13 - Monday

I was just going to make this a week-long post because I didn't think I'd really have anything to day. I don't, not of importance, but I still need a space to sort out all the crap in my head about my diet. I know I screwed up badly. I think I am over the hump though (for now - I have to accept that I will never not have this problem). I ate cleaner today. I didn't weigh or measure or even track but there was no junk. It was a lot of food, but fairly clean.

As it is Recovery Week, today's workout was Yoga X. I had every intention of doing it at 5 AM, but I did not sleep last night and I just didn't have the energy to do it at that time. I waited until I drank some coffee and finished cleaning my house. By that time, I had my second wind and was able to get through it. I really put a lot of effort into the first half and managed just about everything, including a good portion of the twisting half moon. My crane pose was fantastic. Not the full minute but I get stronger and can hold it longer every time. My hamstring stretches were great. I'm looking forward to that part of the Fit Test on Sunday.

P90X - Week 12 - Sunday

X Stretch today, but I did it without the dvd. Tony yaps too much.

Not much to say, other than I've been cleaning all day and I'm in a really pissy mood.

P90X - Week 12 - Saturday

I had a fantastic Kenpo workout today (362 calories burned)! I almost did Kenpo Cardio+ from the P90X+ series but changed my mind because I want to stick to the schedule as much as possible. I've slacked off a bit on Doubles this past week, but I've been cleaning and will continue to do that, along with trying to squeeze a little extra cardio in during my last week. Not that it will matter - I'm up four pounds from my starting weight.

I haven't mentioned him in a while, but I'm a huge fan of Craig Ballantyne. He recently did an interview with Tony Horton. It's a great listen. Tony talks about how he got started in he fitness business, and how he's evolved. He touches on nutrition, which I really made sure to pay attention to, but it's nothing we don't already know, so it doesn't solve my problem. Heck, I don't even know what my problem is. I don't think it's motivational. I'm motivated. Maybe I'm just an impulsive moron. But anyway, if you don't want to download the mp3, you can read the interview on Craig's blog, but I don't think all parts are up yet.

P90X - Week 12 - Friday

I did my final Ab Ripper X and Legs & Back workouts today. I can't believe the hard part is over. Well, I am not a fan of Recovery Week and I still have to get through that and another Fit Test. But for the most part, it's over. Now I get to be Math Geek and play with numbers to see what I've done. I already calculated how many ARX reps I've done - 10470. And I am pleased to say I did break through my goal of 100 pull ups - I did 108 today.

I still need to figure out what I'm going to do about my horrible eating. I know all the strategies for not making bad choices. I have goals and can picture what I want my body to look like. And I still fail. I really do want to continue with Weight Watchers. Like I've said before - the eating plan itself is not the problem. The whole "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels" saying is bunk. Nothing tastes as good as Death By Chocolate ice cream on a double chocolate brownie. Or a spicy chicken pizza with double mozzarella. So that strategy just won't work for me. I don't buy into it at all. So I need to figure out what I do buy into.

P90X - Week 12 - Thursday

I woke up this morning, feeling like hell. I've had some sinus pressure lately that won't go away not matter what I do. I've tried medicines, steam, neti pot - nada! I don't know if it's a cold or allergies. I have a cough but I think it's due to post-nasal drip, rather than anything else. No fever, no headache unless the sinus pressure is bad. Nights are worse than the day. So when I woke up this morning, I wanted to push Yoga X to Sunday. Then I thought I'd do it Saturday, and do Kenpo on Sunday. Then I thought I'd try to just rest for a bit and do Yoga X later in the day. Finally, I just got off my butt and did the damn yoga. At times, it was hard to do the breathing right, and I was off my game so my moves weren't as steady as they normally are. I have two more shots at nailing this next wee. I will say, today's Crane was pretty darn good.

I don't even know what to say about food. I am so frustrated with myself. I've spent the last six months not in definite weight loss mode that I don't know whether I'm coming or going. Every day, I go back and forth - do I want to lose more or do I want to maintain? All this indecision is causing me to make crappy choices. I want to lose more weight, after all. I wish there was a plan I could actually stick with. No matter what I do, I still eat crap (sometimes lots of it). I don't understand this weakness. I am not eating out of boredom or lack of planning or lack of healthy food on hand. It's not a matter of not buying crap. I have stuff in the house often that I don't even think about, but I'll go buy some other crap when the mood strikes.

P90X - Week 12 - Wednesday

Ab Ripper X and Back & Biceps today. I totally rocked my workout. I was up in weights or reps, and even pulled a few unassisted towel pull ups out of my ass.

Food is not going well. I just can't stop eating crap. I don't know why I can't eat the way I work out. It's pissing me off, to be honest.

P90X - Week 12 - Tuesday

Last night was an intense battle of wills. It was me vs. the toaster strudel. Me - 1, junk - 0. Then it was me vs. the crackers. Me - 2, junk - 0. Finally, it was me vs. Fiber One toaster pastries. Final score: me - 3, junk - 0. It sucked. Truly.

Today was my last Plyometrics workout. I brought it, and burned 416 calories. I know I bitch about Plyo all the time, but it's a keeper. I don't think I want to do it every week, but I won't leave it out of my bag of tricks.

Banana Nut Cheerios w/ skim milk, banana

applesauce cookies

omelet w/ onion, green pepper & salsa, light English muffin w/ jelly

fish sandwich

venison & vegetable soup

bunch of crap...

Four cups of coffee an 80 ounces of water.

P90X - Week 12 - Monday

It's the return of Ab Ripper X. It was nice not to have to do it last week (since I did it during the previous Recovery Week). I also did Chest, Shoulders & Triceps. I'll be honest - I did not work as hard as I could have. I was absolutely uninterested in doing P90X today. The only reason I pushed through is because it's the last week of weights. So the light at the end of the tunnel is what keeps me going.

I'm also ravenous today! Seriously, I ate twice before I even worked out. It's going to be a crappy week, food-wise. I've already got it in my head that Thanksgiving (and the lack of extra, proper cardio this week) is messing me up. So, I'll have fewer activity points, different food options (more about my menu in a minute), and a lack of motivation. In my head, that's all permission to just screw it, but in reality, it should be all the more reason for me to buckle down and eat well. This is the battle I'll be facing the next 5 weeks. This week, I'm not even going to bother with keeping track of points. I'm going to try to be good, but I'm not sure I even want to be.

My menu! We're just staying home for Thanksgiving, and my husband actually won't even be here. He's going hunting, and won't get home until way after dark. We discussed it and decided we did not want a traditional Thanksgiving feast. After lots of back and forth and many menu changes, I've decided to make it a Hell's Kitchen Thanksgiving. We're huge fans of Gordon Ramsay and his shows, so I picked some items off the menu from the Hell's Kitchen competition. So far, I have risotto, wellington (venison, not beef), and chocolate souffle. The only thing on that list I have ever made is risotto, and I don't even make true risotto - I make an easy version. But anyway, I'm going to give that all a shot. I'd like to have one more dish, but I'm not sure what. It's hard finding the menus from the show.

Banana Nut Cheerios w/ skim milk, banana

apple & cottage cheese

omelet w/ onions, green pepper, cheese & salsa, light English muffin w/ jelly

salad w/ sliced turkey, green peppers & light ranch dressing

whole grain spaghetti w/ venison meatballs & onion gravy, homemade garlic bread, half a cookie (I won't say how big the cookie was)

garden vegetable medley; Okay, the cookie was a bad idea. All I wanted after I ate it was more junk.

Two cups of coffee and 80 ounces of water.

P90X - Week 11 - Sunday

I did a little X Stretch today, or as I prefer to call it - Snooze-A-Palooza. It was regularly scheduled and I still have one to make up. I will probably do that on Tuesday.

Week 12 is going to be different. Instead of doing extra cardio, I'm going to deep clean my house. I really need to do it now, because I want to offer a bunch of Christmas stuff (trees, lights, ornaments, etc.) on Freecycle. I also want to go through Sebastian's toys and books, getting rid of the things he doesn't use any more. Then I need to start getting ready for the holidays. My father-in-law is coming down for Christmas, and I need to redo my kitchen to prep for all the baking I have planned. I am going overboard on the cookies and bars (double batches of 11 recipes), but I don't care. Baking goodies is the only think I like about Christmas and damn it, I am going to enjoy it.

Banana Nut Cheerios w/ skim milk, banana [4 pts]

omelet w/ onion, cheese & salsa, light English muffin w/ jelly [6 pts]

fudge baby [2 pts]

chicken breast salad w/ light sour cream & salsa [6 pts]

roasted venison & couscous [7 pts]

apple & cottage cheese [5 pts]

Four cups of coffee [1 pt] and 20 ounces of water. Yeah, I sucked with the water.

31 points today. 0 weekly and 6 activity points to waste.

P90X - Week 11 - Saturday

Today was Plyometrics, since I couldn't do it Tuesday and did Kenpo instead. It doesn't bother me to jump anymore. I worked harder than I have in a while, probably since Phase 3 started. I burned 408 calories (earning 4 Activity Points). It was fun and exhausting. Since Thanksgiving is next week, I'm going to be thankful that I won't have to do this workout again after Tuesday!

I also did my dive bomber push ups that I skipped on Monday. My body is feeling pretty much 100% so I can stretch and put pressure on my belly now. I'm still paranoid that I'm going to get pregnant. I just can't win.

apple & cottage cheese [3 pts]

turkey & bacon w/ lettuce, onion, green pepper, light mayo & pepper jack cheese on flat bread, apple slices [12 pts]; We went to Subway for lunch. It wasn't really all that filling and I was still hungry an hour later.

carrot sticks & green pepper slices w/ avocado hummus [1 pt]

applesauce cookies [4 pts]; I have a huge jar of unsweetened applesauce and I wanted to get in the mood for holiday baking, so I gave these a shot. I've never had them before. They are good, I guess. I'm not a huge fan of apple desserts. My son will eat them, for sure.

banana [1 pt]

omelet w/ onion, green pepper, cheese & salsa, light English muffin w/ jelly [6 pts]

peppermint patty [3 pts]; I am really proud of myself. I stood in the checkout line at the store forever - I had no choice but to stare at the candy. I really wanted a king size peanut butter anything, but controlled myself and made a rational purchase of 1 peppermint patty.

garden vegetable medley [2 pts]; I passed on a toaster strudel and a grilled cheese sandwich and picked the smarter option. Still, I feel like a pig.

Three cups of coffee [0 pts] and 80 ounces of water.

32 points today. 0 weekly and 17 activity points remaining.

P90X - Week 11 - Friday

Legs and Back this morning (2 Activity Points, but I really should take 3). I am so close to breaking 100 pull ups. I'm up to 20 unassisted chin/pull ups. I'm going to break 100 next week. I am sure of it. I also did my 4 mile walk (309 calories burned, 3 Activity Points). I don' know why the numbers are so high today as compared to others the last week. I was walking quite a bit faster (completed it in under an hour) and against a vicious wind. Yeah, that sounds good :p

I don't know what the deal is but my belly is really bloated, even more than it was when I left the hospital. In the last two days, my pants are suddenly tighter and it's annoying the crap out of me. My throat is also sore again. That's the most annoying of all.

Banana Nut Cheerios w/ skim milk, banana [4 pts]

omelet w/ onion, green pepper, cheese & salsa [6 pts]

chicken breast w/ barbecue sauce, carrots & green pepper slices w/ avocado hummus [5 pts]

fudge baby [2 pts]

mixed vegetables [1 pt]

venison tenderloin & garden vegetable medley [7 pts]

Four cups of coffee [1 pt] and 80 ounces of water.

26 points today. 5 weekly and 20 activity points remaining.

P90X - Week 11 - Thursday

Yoga this morning (2 Activity Points). I didn't stretch my core too much during the upward dogs and such. My incisions have healed nicely but I am still trying to take it a bit easier than normal. I was able to do Yoga Belly 7 with no problems (other than hating it as usual). And I swear, I am never going to get that twisting half moon crap down. After yoga, I took about a 4 mile walk (224 calories burned). Between the two, I earned 4 Activity Points.

I'm having a bit of a problem with food. I swear, I am a bipolar eater. I either don't care and eat everything in sight, or I panic and try to stay within my daily points, and not touch my weeklies or my APs!! It's ridiculous because I know I'm supposed to eat at least the weekly points. I definitely think I should be eating my APs because Weight Watchers doesn't give me enough points (IMO, of course - I don't think the calorie deficit should be so big). I also don't think I get enough activity. I'm a total contradictory mess right now. I'd like to lose a few more pounds (I'd be perfectly content to lose only 5 more), but I also want to bulk. I can't bulk on Weight Watchers, I know that. But I cannot go back to counting calories. I just can't. It makes me nuts. And in order to get enough calorie to bulk, I'd need to know how much I'm eating. I don't want to overdo it. Damn, damn, damn. I hate when I get my head like this, especially when I know damn well that it's all going to fall apart with the holidays. I'm not even going to say I'll try to be good. I say that every year. The only part of the stupid holidays I like is the sweets. I have 11 different treats planned out. Maybe I should make it 12 for the 12 Days of Christmas. I want to make lots and lots of goodies to give out to my son's teachers, and to my own mouth. I should have named this blog "I don't know what the hell I want!" I love thinking, prepping, and eating in terms of points - it makes life so much easier. But I'm just always so hungry.

Banana Nut Cheerios w/ skim milk, banana [4 pts]

omelet w/ onion, green pepper, cheese & salsa, light English muffin w/ jelly [5 pts]

chicken salad [4 pts]

fudge babies [4 pts]; Portion control with these sucks.

broiled tilapia parmesan & broccoli in cheese sauce [6 pts]; This fish was fantastic! I'd leave out the celery salt though.

fudge babies [4 pts]

apple & cottage cheese [3 pts]

Four cups of coffee [1 pt] and 80 ounces of water.

31 points today. 11 weekly and 15 activity points remaining.

P90X - Week 11 - Wednesday

I got in about a 4 mile walk this morning. It wasn't as quick as normal. It takes me a while to get warmed up, for some reason (probably a little gas left over from my tubal), and I get a stitch in my sternum. It goes away after a while, but I did take it easy anyway. I walked for 62 minutes and burned 194 calories (2 Activity Points). I came home, rested for about 15 minutes, then did Shoulders & Arms (2 Activity Points). It whooped me. I've made progress on paper but it always feels like I'm not getting any stronger. I'm working on a chart that shows my progress for all the workouts - I'll post that on the last day when I post my final stats and Fit Test results.

Banana Nut Cheerios w/ skim milk, banana [4 pts]

apple & cottage cheese [3 pts]

chicken salad w/ light sour cream & salsa [4 pts]

carrot sticks [0 pts]

venison meat loaf & garden medley vegetables [6 pts]

fudge baby [4 pts]; I discovered this gem on a raw vegan blog. I have never, to my recollection, had a (fruit) date before so I was a bit skeptical. I am no longer a skeptic.

garden medley vegetables [2 pts]; These Green Giant steamer things are awesome!

Two cups of coffee [0 pts] and 80 ounces of water.

25 points today. 22 weekly and 11 activity points remaining.

P90X - Week 11 - Tuesday

I decided to hold off on Plyometrics until Saturday. Jumping too much makes my belly feel weird, so I did Kenpo today (323 calories, earning 3 Activity Points). It was a decent workout but I was disappointed that I couldn't really do the jumping jacks or X jumps. Meh, I'm still recovering, and I need to accept that. I feel great though.

Kashi honey oat waffles w/ sugar-free syrup [3 pts]

omelet w/ onion, green pepper & salsa, light English muffin w/ sugar-free jam [4 pts]

carrot sticks, green pepper slices & turkey slices w/ avocado hummus [4 pts]

roasted chicken w/ light sour cream, salsa, lettuce, onions & green peppers [4 pts]

country fried steak & mixed vegetables [5 pts]

yogurt [2 pts]

cheese [1 pt]; My mother-in-law sent down some Buffalo wing cheddar cheese and that stuff is freaking awesome! Very delicious but so spicy, so I can only eat a little bit!

Four cups of coffee [1 pt] and 80 ounces of water.

24 points today. 27 weekly and 7 activity points remaining.

P90X - Week 11 - Monday

Wow, three weeks to go! Today was my final Chest & Back workout (2 Activity Points earned). Too bad - I really like this one. Now, this is dumb but I was really disappointed with my workout, even though I either stayed the same or improved. I think I was just nervous, even though I was in no pain or even discomfort at all from my tubal (I was given NO post-op instructions regarding exercise - or anything else for that matter - so I just listened to my body). I will admit I skipped the dive-bomber push ups. My abdomen usually grazes the floor when I do them, and I didn't want to chance anything. So, I will do them during recovery week some time.

Before I did Chest & Back, I tried to get my extra cardio in. It was a slow 16-minute mile before I came home to rest. Then after my P90X workout, a shower and some breakfast, I walked to the post office, then did another mile. So 42 minutes and another 2.5 miles later, I felt really great. Between the two walks, I burned 241 calories, earning 2 Activity Points.

Banana Nut Cheerios w/ skim milk, banana [4 pts]

omelet w/ onion, green pepper & salsa, light English muffin w/ jelly [4 pts]

roasted chicken w/ lettuce, onion, green pepper, light sour cream & salsa [5 pts]

pork ribs & mixed vegetables [10 pts]

carrot sticks [0 pts]

Four cups of coffee [1 pt] and 80 ounces of water.

24 points today. 31 weekly and 4 activity points remaining. For shiggles, I logged everything in my tracker to see how many calories this was - a mere 1321 [166 g carbs (22 fiber), 100 g protein, 35 g fat]. Not enough for my liking, but I really don't want to eat any more tonight.

P90X - Week 10 - Friday Through Sunday

Another few days of the "I don't care if it's junk" diet. Friday's goal was to be able to swallow food. I woke up in the morning, completely stiff and sore. My incisions had a dull ache, but my throat was in horrible shape. It hurt to even breathe and prepare to swallow. Actually swallowing made my eyes tear up. My throat was swollen and tender from the breathing tube Thursday. So eating perfectly was not high on my list of priorities. Actually, it wasn't even on the list.

Saturday was much better. My throat was a little sore but I could pretty much eat normally. And by normally, I mean junk. It was impossible to get back on track, so I didn't even try. My incisions were about 90% better - just a little tenderness if I rubbed against them.

As of Sunday, I'm feeling almost 100%. I'm eating like crap and that pisses me off, but I think not exercising has a lot to do with it. I know I'll be 100% on track tomorrow, no doubt. It's really sucked not working out and I'm looking forward to hitting the weights again tomorrow. I am glad I did Ab Ripper X during Recovery Week though - my stomach is bruised from the doctor pushing on it, probably when he pushed the gas back out. My husband said the pattern looks exactly like a hand print. My belly button incision is in good shape, but the one by my c-section scar is all bruised and still a little puffy, so I left the tape on it. Because of that, I also did not do X Stretch today. I will do it at a later date, sometime in the next two weeks. I didn't think my abs would like me very much if I did Bow and Camel and all that stuff that works the core.

P90X - Week 10 - Thursday

Today's post has nothing to do with P90X or Weight Watchers or dieting and fitness. I want to post about my surgery - mostly for my own records, but hey, you never know who may stumble upon it. I had a bilateral tubal ligation, so if there are any guys reading who get uncomfortable with womanly issues, click away now.

I had a lot of anxiety over this procedure, not because I was having doubts but because I was afraid of complications from the anesthesia. I'm not usually worried about stuff like that but it really, really freaked me out.

I went in, did my paperwork & urine sample, then waited. And waited. My surgery was scheduled for 9:30, but I didn't go into the OR until closer to 10:30. The IV was very uncomfortable, especially if I bent my arm (they put it inside my elbow instead of my hand). I started crying when they put the oxygen mask over my face - more because I was scared of the anesthesia than anything else. I did fight the anesthesia as much as I could LOL And that's all I remember until I started waking up. When I first started to come around, the only thing I could really focus on was how much my throat hurt from the breathing tube. I wanted to cough but it just hurt. I was trying to hard to wake up all the way but I kept drifting back to sleep. I said something about nausea, and I think they gave me something for it. I don't know - I was out of it. I woke up again and managed to stay conscious. Throat still hurt and I was sore from the IUD removal. I couldn't feel my incisions at all. I still don't feel any pain there (in my belly button and above my c-section scar). I wasn't even sure they actually did the tubal until someone came to check the area. I was still loopy, and they gave me some ginger ale and graham crackers. I was so hungry, I tried to eat the crackers but the dry mouth was so bad, I thought I'd choke. By the time I finished my ginger ale, they had husband on the phone to come get me. I was a bit dizzy for a while if I stood up too quickly, but I hit McDonalds on the way home. It took me forever to eat and it made me crazy because I was ravenous. All I cared about is food. LOL

I don't know what they gave me for pain while under - whatever it is must have been strong because I'm still not feeling anything there. They did not give me a prescription for anything and just told me to take Advil or Tylenol as needed.

It took me about 2 hours to eat my lunch. I did eat junk - I didn't care, and I didn't count points. It had been 22 hours since I'd last eaten and I was freaking hungry. I did eat the M&Ms I bought last year, finally. I didn't really enjoy them, with the cotton-mouth and all.

P90X - Week 10 - Wednesday

It's my last crazy workout day. This morning, I did Kenpo, Jillian's Cardio Kickbox & Turbo Jam 20 Minute Workout (613 calories burned). Just after noon, I did Ab Ripper and Chest, Shoulders & Triceps. I had to get it all done today because I'm not allowed to drink water in the morning. This morning's craziness earned me 8 Activity Points.

A huge challenge today was the need to be on a clear liquid diet after lunch. I ate my last meal around 2 PM. As the hours went on, I go crankier and crankier. I'm so used to eating frequently that even just an hour or two past my "scheduled" time really bothers me. I am going to have to take a sleeping pill and go to bed early so I don't a) realize I'm hungry and b) toss and turn all night trying to sleep but not sleeping because I'm too anxious about the surgery. I am scared to death of the anesthesia. I've been under before with no real problems, but for some reason it's really bothering me this time around.

apple & cottage cheese [4 pts]

turkey sandwich, carrot sticks, black bean & corn salad w/ avocado lime vinaigrette [7 pts]

crustless pumpkin pie [3 pts]

omelet w/ onion, green pepper & salsa, multigrain English muffin w/ light cream cheese & jelly [5 pts]

Four cups of coffee [1 pt] and 80 ounces of water.

20 points today, with 0 weekly and 17 activity points remaining.

P90X - Week 10 - Tuesday

I suck. I suck so hard I make my Dyson look weak. After I blogged last night, I ate so much crap - candy corn, chocolate chips, pretzels, pumpkin pie. I might be overestimating, but I'm going to take away all my weekly points. I am completely disgusted with my inability to control these impulses for more than a week. I don't know if it's the stress of Thursday's surgery or what. It may be, but that doesn't excuse my other binges. Hell, it doesn't even excuse this one. I felt like total crap (physically) as I was eating the junk!! Why the hell do I do this to myself???? GAHHHHHHH!!!

Ab Ripper & a 4 mile walk this morning (266 calories burned, earned 2 Activity Points). I did Legs & Back (2 Activity Points) later in the morning. My pull ups are increasing each week, which is good, but for some reason I can't match Week 7's unassisted chin up count. Must have been a fluke. Still, I'm up quite a bit overall. I wish I would have done some chin ups in the fit test, which calls for wide grip pull ups. It would have been interesting to see some real progress, because I think my final fit test pull up count is going to be the same as my initial. I just can't do wide grip pull ups. I can do 1 close grip pull up at a time, and I can do chin ups. But no wide grip. For one thing, my arms are way too short to reach even the closest "wide" grip on my bar (comfortably anyway). And I still don't (and probably will never) have the upper body strength to haul 130 pounds straight up.

cereal w/ skim milk [4 pts]

omelet w/ onion, green pepper, avocado & salsa, multigrain English muffin w/ jelly [7 pts]

sliced turkey w/ mustard, carrot sticks, sliced green peppers, pickle [3 pts]

banana [1 pt]

turkey sandwich [4 pts]

Four cups of coffee [1 pt] and 80 ounces of water.

20 points today. 0 weekly and 9 activity points remaining.

P90X - Week 10 - Monday

Yoga and Plyo (362 calories burned) this morning - 5 Activity Points. There's not really much to say about the workouts. They were typical.

Banana Nut Cheerios w/ skim milk, banana [4 pts]

omelet w/ onion, green pepper & turkey slices, multigrain English muffin w/ jelly [5 pts]

sliced turkey w/ mustard, carrot sticks & green pepper slices, pickle [3 pts]

black bean & corn salad w/ avocado lime dressing [4 pts]

teriyaki chicken w/ mixed vegetables [5 pts]; This was so, so good. I could have eaten the entire batch, but I only had a little bit.

yogurt & candy corn [7 pts]; Don't ask.

Four cups of coffee [1 pt] and 80 ounces of water.

29 points today. 26 weekly and 5 activity points remaining. Damn candy corn.

P90X - Week 9 - Sunday

Technically, it's the end of week 9 but I'm starting Week 10's workouts today. Well, yesterday's cardio was to get a jump on next week's cardio. Oh, never mind.

This morning, I did ARX, Cardio Kickbox (153 calories) & Turbo 20 Minute Workout (139 calories). This evening, Back & Biceps. No regression on this one. I made improvements in several places. It was a good workout - I felt really good, and strong. Energized, even. I gave myself 5 Activity Points for all of it.

Banana Nut Cheerios w/ skim milk [3 pts]

omelet w/ onion, green pepper & salsa, turkey bacon, multigrain English muffin w/ reduced sugar jam [8 pts]

banana [1 pt]

carrot sticks & green pepper slices [0 pts]

baked tilapia & sweet potato [7 pts]

pumpkin pie [5 pts]

apple & cottage cheese [6 pts]

Four cups of coffee [1 pt] and 80 ounces of water.

31 points today. 0 weekly and 0 activity points remaining. I busted my ass this week and I wasn't letting a single AP go to waste.

P90X - Week 9 - Saturday

I ate a protein granola bar & yogurt after blogging last night - six activity points subtracted.

Yeah, my legs are total toast today, so no Plyo. Instead, I did X Stretch, Turbo Jam 20 Minute Workout (143 calories) and Jillian Michaels Cardio Kickbox (24 minutes, 148 calories). Altogether, 291 calories, and I gave myself 3 Activity Points.

Banana Nut Cheerios [3 pts]

scrambled eggs w/ onion, green pepper & salsa. light English muffin w/ light cream cheese & jelly [5 pts]

chicken breast, green pepper slices, corn & black bean salad w/ avocado lime vinaigrette [7 pts]

banana [1 pt]; I am desperately trying not to eat the chocolate in the freezer. I have the points to have a piece or two but I'm afraid I won't stop with one or two.

chicken, pasta & vegetable casserole [7 pts]

chocolates [6 pts]; Obviously, I failed.

Five cups of coffee [1 pt] and 80 ounces of water.

30 points today. 0 weekly and 6 activity points remaining.

P90X - Week 9 - Friday

Crazy exercise day. Things start doubling up and shifting around as I try to get everything out of the way before my tubal on Thursday. I know I should probably just suck it up and take an extra week but I am SO OVER this program. Don't get me wrong - I love it, I think it's fantastic, and I see myself doing it again some day, but right now, I just need to get away from Tony Horton. I just want it to be over.

This morning was Ab Ripper X and Legs & Back (2 Activity Points). I didn't get as many unassisted chin ups as I did the last time I did this workout (2 weeks ago). I don't know if it's my mental state or I'm just tired. This whole week, I haven't been satisfied with my performance. I'm improving in some areas and not in others - sometimes even going backwards. I'm sure it's just mental. I know I haven't been nearly as excited about Phase 3 as I was about the first two. Plus, decided to try to squeeze in all the extra stuff is stressing me out. Too late now. I just need to get through the next 6 days.

It's marathon weekend here on the Outer Banks of North Carolina. I knew there was an annual marathon but I did not realize there was also a half-marathon, an 8K, and a 5K. So, in honor of this weekend, today's Doubles cardio was a 5K walk (50 minutes 224 calories, 2 Activity Points). I did this immediately after Legs & Back. Don't ask me what I was thinking. I wasn't. But it gets worse.

After my 5K, I grabbed some food and sat down for 45 minutes to watch Friday Night Lights. It's a little light on the Riggins so far this season, which is disappointing. Man, Taylor Kitsch is one fine hunk of meat. What is it with guys named Taylor and total hot? Taylor Lautner's body is even better than Taylor Kitsch's, but since TL is only 17 (18 in 4 months), I can't really comment further. But I digress. After my quick break, I got a head start and did tomorrow's Kenpo X workout (323 calories and 3 Activity Points). I will admit, it was rough because my legs were tired. I have never been so happy to do blocks in all my life. Needless to say, I am exhausted!!! But, I'm hoping my legs will be well enough to do Plyo tomorrow. I know I should rest them more, but this crazy situation I've put myself in really is a one-time thing. I can handle all the regular workouts being scrunched together. It's this Doubles stuff that has me stressed, trying to fit in FOUR extra cardio workouts a week (instead of the three from the last phase). Those three and a half days of rest I'll be getting after my surgery next week are going to be bliss!

Banana Nut Cheerios w/ skim milk [3 pts]

apple & cottage cheese [3 pts]

chicken breast, green pepper slices & avocado hummus [4 pts]

venison sausage patty w/ cheese on multigrain English muffin [6 pts]

green pepper slices [0 pts]

venison tenderloin, corn & black bean salad w/ avocado lime vinaigrette dressing [8 pts]

Four cups of coffee [1 pt] and 80 ounces of water.

25 points today. 0 weekly and 19 activity points remaining.

P90X - Week 9 - Thursday

I ended up eating 2 granola protein bars after I blogged last night, taking away 8 of my weekly points. I could have eaten a ton more.

Butt crack of dawn yoga today. I am really getting better. I can do just about everything - the only two poses I still have even a little trouble with are twisting half moon and crane, but I can hold them for a bit. Rock on. 2 Activity Points for Yoga. I did Turbo Jam Cardio Party 3 again (371 calories burned, 3 Activity Points). Technically, the fourth day of doubles is supposed to go on Plyo day. Screw that!!! I don't even want to walk to the shower after Plyo, much less do more cardio. So I do it after yoga.

Today is Day 60 for me. Technically, I should have weighed in and done pictures and measurements. That's too much work. I'll wait until the end.

I am rethinking whether I'm going to do another round of P90X. I was so sure I would do P90X+ (along with the other Beachbody stuff I had planned). Then I read this blog. It's a critique of P90X that points out the "flaws" in the program. They aren't really flaws but they do go against my "lift heavy for fewer reps" preference for weight lifting. The blogger points out that the P90X routines are essentially circuits of mid-to-high reps. Yeah, I do opt for the 8-10 rep range, but even that is pretty high compared to what I like. I like the 3x5 and 5x5 or 4x6 rep ranges. I like multiple sets of really heavy (for me) weights. So I don't think I could be happy doing P90X again. And if I use that same logic, ChaLean Extreme won't be "right" for me again. I can't say anything about Insanity yet - that's all cardio, and I know I'm not ready for it. So now I need to rethink my game plan.

This does not mean P90X hasn't helped me. Hello!! I can do pull ups and push ups now. Know what that means? That I can actually use those in any routines I design on my own, or actually do them in routines I find (like New Rules of Lifting - I love that program). I will continue to do yoga and stretch when I finish P90X (probably not the P90X dvds though, unless I need a Daniel fix). I think I need to pull out my NROL book again and maybe do that. My husband has been "doing" the workouts for a couple months - that means he did 2 weeks of Break In workouts, then moved on to the goods, and only did one week (and his workouts are only twice a week!!!). Maybe if I'm doing it, he'll get his ass in gear.

Banana Nut Cheerios w/ skim milk [3 pts]

protein granola bar [4 pts]

chicken breast, cauliflower w/ light mayo & mustard, yogurt [5 pts]

Strawberry Mini Wheats [5 pts]; I only eat Mini Wheats dry. And these were getting stale. I do like them for a snack.

apple [1 pt]

omelet w/ onion, green pepper & salsa, light English muffin w/ jelly, homemade venison sausage [7 pts]

pumpkin pie [6 pts]

Two cups of coffee [0 pts] and 80 ounces of water.

31 points today. 0 weekly and 17 activity points remaining.

P90X - Week 9 - Wednesday

Ab Ripper & Turbo this morning (353 calories - 3 Activity Points). I got through the Fifer Scissors without a break!! I really dislike ARX. Really. I did Shoulders & Arms in the afternoon (2 Activity Points). I wanted to skip the workout so badly. My head was killing me and my gut felt like someone ran into me with a battering ram (side effect from ibuprofen is the only thing I can think of, even though I've never had a problem with the stuff before). I half-assed the warm up and took lots of breaks (usually after every 3 sets). It sucked. My performance was good, until the end - that last set of Congdon curls (or maybe it was the crouching Cohens) didn't go as far as I would have liked. Oh well. I am, for damn sure, doing Legs & Back first on Friday (well, after ARX) and saving the cardio for later in the day.

Total cereal w/ skim milk, banana [3 pts]

scrambled eggs w/ onion, green pepper & salsa. light English muffin w/ light cream cheese & jelly [5 pts]

grilled chicken breast, baked sweet potato fries, green pepper slices, avocado hummus [5 pts]

apple & cottage cheese [4 pts]

ground venison & cauliflower casserole [5 pts]

yogurt [3 pts]

protein granola bar [4 pts]

Four cups of coffee [1 pt] and 80 ounces of water.

30 points today. 18 weekly and 13 activity points remaining.

P90X - Week 9 - Tuesday

I am so off my game this week. First there were yesterday's pitiful workouts. I followed up today with another less-than-stellar performance. I did Plyo and only burned 359 calories, as opposed to the 400+ I normally burn. I felt like I should do another workout, because those numbers blow. I only earned 3 Activity Points today.

Then I sat down and thought about it while I was eating my breakfast. I am doing enough. I don't need to exercise more for weight loss. I'm now 100% committed to exercising for fitness now. So the real question is - do I want to lose any more weight? I don't know. I'm considering a bulk next summer - maybe I should rearrange that and do it in the spring. I just don't know. I definitely want to add some muscle, but I'd have to really drop the amount of cardio I do, and find that fine line between eating enough over maintenance levels, and eating too much. I don't think I'm quite ready for that yet. So maybe I'll wait until summer.

I'm really sore today. You'd think it was the first time I did pull ups and chin ups.

banana [1 pt]

omelet w/ onion, green pepper & salsa, light English muffin w/ light cream cheese & jelly [5 pts]

homemade venison jerky [2 pts]

apple & cottage cheese [3 pts]

mozzarella string cheese, steamed cauliflower w/ light mayo & mustard dressing [3 pts]; I did not want to eat before dinner but I was so hungry, my stomach hurt.

yogurt [3 pts]

turkey sandwich [4 pts]

ground venison, steamed cauliflower w/ light mayo & mustard dressing [5 pts]

Four cups of coffee [1 pt] and 80 ounces of water.

27 points today. 28 weekly and 8 activity points remaining.

P90X - Week 9 - Monday

When I woke up this morning, I couldn't decide whether I wanted to do Cardio X or Turbo Jam Cardio Party 3. On one hand, Cardio X is part of the program. On the other, I burn more calories and have more fun with Turbo. I went with Turbo, but I didn't get nearly the burn I usually do (only 366 calories - I gave myself 3 Activity Points). I think it's because it was 5 AM and I was afraid of waking the guys up. Next time, I won't care. I did Ab Ripper before Turbo. Then, as I'm supposed to, I did Chest & Back (2 Activity Points) way later in the day. I did it after I picked Sebastian up from school. For some reason, I really struggled with the pull ups today. My push ups were great though - lots of improvement there!

I've decided that I am going to celebrate the completion of this round of P90X by going to see New Moon. I haven't been to a movie by myself in a while, though I keep meaning to go. I definitely think becoming a P90X grad deserves a little reward. And I sure as hell need the motivation to get through the next 5 weeks. So, as soon as I finish my fit test on December 6, I am off to the theater.

The next two to three weeks are going to be a little hectic. This week will be normal until Sunday. I need to start next week's workouts on that day, then move a few things around in order to get everything in by that Thursday morning. I'm having a tubal ligation (cut & burned!) on November 12, and I did not want to get behind. I should be able to get everything in, and that will leave me the afternoon of surgery, and Friday through Sunday to recuperate. And since I did 3 Ab Ripper workouts last week when they weren't scheduled, I'll have the entire week after the tubal free of any ab work. I am pretty sure I can handle the weights & cardio, but I wanted to give my abs more time to heal.

I've mentioned a few times that I bought myself a small bag of dark chocolate M&Ms, but wouldn't eat them unless I had a plan. They are still in my freezer. And I have a plan. I bought the bag on November 12, 2008. My surgery is exactly one year later. Since I can't eat anything after midnight, and only a very light dinner - they actually prefer a clear liquid diet after noon on the 11th (surgery is at 9:30 AM, and I do have a workout that morning before I head to the hospital), I am going to eat the whole bag on the way home from the hospital. It's not much of a plan, but I'm just going with it.

Yikes! Sorry for the novel.

banana [1 pt]

omelet w/ onion, green pepper & salsa, light English muffin w/ light cream cheese & jelly [5 pts]

grilled chicken breast, green pepper slices w/ avocado hummus [4 pts]

apple & cottage cheese [3 pts]

roased Bambi, mixed vegetables & jasmine rice [6 pts]

Four cups of coffee [1 pt] and 80 ounces of water.

20 points today. 35 weekly and 5 activity points remaining. After this weekend fiasco, I'm afraid to dip in to any of my extras. Fortunately, I wasn't all that hungry today.

P90X - Week 8 - Sunday

Last night was absolutely horrible. I ended up not drinking but I ate so much crap, my body feels as if I got completely drunk. And I have a really bad headache. I just want to crawl in bed and dream of guillotines. There is a reason I don't drink alcohol very often. I absolutely hate how it makes me feel after the buzz is gone. It's the same damn thing with sugar. The buzz from liquor lasts longer than the high from sugar, too. I can very easily say no to booze. I drink once every year or two. And I mean have anything alcoholic. I don't have a beer now and then, and I use as hell don't have the occasional glass of wine with dinner. I want my relationship with sugar to be the same way. Why can't I get to that point? I never crave alcohol. Why do I crave sugar all the damn time?

Thus, my heart was not in X Stretch today. I did it, but it was half-hearted. I don't care to do this workout on its own anyway. I do much better when I've had some cardio warm up. So, I'm moving it to Saturdays after Kenpo.

sliced turkey breast & avocado hummus on Flat Out bread, red pepper slices [3 pts]

grilled chicken breast & baked sweet potato chips [5 pts]

omelet w/ onion, green pepper & salsa, light English muffin w/ light cream cheese & jelly [5 pts]

pumpkin smoothie [2 pts]

Two cups of coffee [0 pts] and 80 ounces of water.

I ate the rest of the chocolate gremlins. I am over on points for the day/week. Starting fresh tomorrow.