2016 Fit Test 1

So my lame ass is back. I spent the last week putting together a year-long workout schedule, after spending two months trying to decide what to do. I'm doing New Rules of Lifting for Women (again) and Lou's new program, Strong. I mapped them out and both of them together would have taken me into early November. To stretch it out a bit, I'm adding the original New Rules of Lifting program's Break In workouts at the beginning and the end. I have a fabulous spreadsheet on my Google Drive   that is going to keep all my stats for every workout neatly in one place.

I guess today is measurements day. I'm only taking two, and only one of them I really care about. Weight, which I don't give two shits about, is 154 pounds. Not as bad as I thought. The measurement I do care about is that damn distance around my midsection. You know the one, where the belly sticks out/hangs and the love handles jiggle, That region spans a girthy 42.25 inches around. Blech. That's the number I care about, the one I want to go down.

So what's in store for today? You surely don't think I am going to kick things off with pumping iron, do you? Oh hell no. Gotta ease back into that shit. Today is Shaun T's Insanity Fit Test. And maybe the Performance Assessment from Insanity: The Asylum. I don't know if I can do both of them in one day. That's 40 minutes of hell. Okay, it's really only 20 minutes of actual work but I haven't worked in years. And tomorrow, to sort of keep my spirits up, will be Turbo Jam 20 Minute Workout. On Sunday I hit the weights.

What about nutrition? The bane of my existence. As my good bitch-friend, Melty, will tell you, I hate measuring and tracking my food. I considered using MyFitnessPal but I highly doubt I have the time, energy, or inclination to log my food.  I don't mind jotting it down here, but there's no way I'm going to obsess over every ounce. I want to do Weight Watcher's Simply Filling Technique, but I don't really have a convenient way to track the shit that's not a Power Food. Well, I'm sure I could figure out a way but, again - lazy! And now I see they just rolled out an entirely new points system, and I'm not going to waste my energy trying to pirate the information. There is a Weight Watchers around the corner from my apartment, but not only am I lazy, I am cheap. Plus, I know what I'm fucking doing. I don't really think joining will help me. I'm a loner.

Ok, Fit Test results:

Switch Kicks - 84
Power Jacks - 34
Power Knees - 85
Power Jumps - 5
Globe Jumps - 4
Suicide Jumps - 10
Push Up Jacks - 1/2 - Yes, a half.
Low Plank Obliques - 12

I was miserable by the time I finished the power knees.  My head hurt and I was very dehydrated. So this fit test sucked. Needless to say, I didn't do the Performance Assessment. I'll save that for 2017's Shaun T Challenge.

Food:

• Coffee w/ Splenda and French vanilla creamer - This is one thing I won't give up. Ever. 
• Sausage burritos (2) and hash brown from McDonald's - Not a good choice, I know
• English muffin w/ jelly - This was the most delicious thing I'd eaten all day and wanted another. Unfortunately, I was out of jelly. How am I going to lose weight if all I want is English muffins with jelly???
• Spaghetti w/ meatballs
• Cheerios

Meh. Not the first day I wanted.