I'm done pissing around. Shame is a powerful tool. I got on the scale yesterday. Midday. Fully clothed and hormonal. It wasn't pretty. I have gained 30 pounds since I finished Insanity at the beginning of June. Or hell, maybe it was the end of May. I don't really remember. I sent a text to my fitness friend so I would have someone to be accountable too. I was going to keep it between us. But I can't do that. It belongs in my blog, where I've bared my soul for four years.
My eating was out of control all summer. I didn't exercise. I continued to eat badly once school started and I only got a little bit of activity. I've noticed that Sebastian's behavior has gotten worse since school started and he's gained a little bit of weight, too. He had been slimming down in the spring. And then I fell apart, and I took him with me. I can't remember hating myself as much as I do now. I have to stop the junk, for myself and for him. It's just so, so, so fucking hard.
So here I am. I can't let this continue. My work pants are uncomfortable. I feel like crap. My 8K is Saturday. After that, I am back to training. I have one week to decide what I'm going to do. I need to pick a program. I'll have 17 weeks before the Spartan Sprint, so I can pick a 12-13 week program and still have room to do other stuff. I think I'm going to do the Turbo Fire/ChaLean Extreme hybrid.
coffee w/ skim milk
apple & yogurt
salad w/ black beans, corn & fat free dressing
omelet w/ onions, peppers & cheese
I didn't get any water today. I need to work on that.